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Thread: New arrest in war on terror

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Lost in fantasy land
    Thanked: 0

    New arrest in war on terror

    Subject: Al-Gebra Movement

    At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered
    to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while
    in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and
    a calculator.

    At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said
    he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He
    is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

    "Al-Gebra is a fearsome cult,", Ashcroft said. "They desire average
    solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in
    a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like "x"
    and "y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have
    determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis
    of medieval with coordinates in every country.

    "As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides
    to every triangle," Ashcroft declared.

    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God
    had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have
    given us more fingers and toes.

    "I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is
    intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to
    disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love
    to inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said,
    adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root,
    make our point, and draw the line."

    President Bush warned, "These weapons of math instruction have the
    potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never
    before seen unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to
    factor-in random facts of vertex."

    Attorney General Ashcroft said, "As our Great Leader would say, read
    my ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they
    continue to multiply, their days are numbered as the hypotenuse
    tightens around their necks."
    I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed man.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    The bunker
    Thanked: 12
    Yes indeed:-))))
    Due to the shortage of trained trumpeters
    the end of the world
    will be posponed
    for three months
    короткий разговор

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