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Thread: How to save a friendship

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    How to save a friendship

    Have you ever felt that you are losing your friend just because your and his/her life has changed, maybe you are geographically far from each other, or just don't have enough time to get together or even chat online? I know it happens often when you have a family/kids and start to focus on your private life. Or your career is eating you up. But friendship is a damn good thing in life which cannot be replaced by anything else. What to do ?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Potty View Post
    Have you ever felt that you are losing your friend just because your and his/her life has changed, maybe you are geographically far from each other, or just don't have enough time to get together or even chat online? I know it happens often when you have a family/kids and start to focus on your private life. Or your career is eating you up. But friendship is a damn good thing in life which cannot be replaced by anything else. What to do ?
    I don't think there's much you can do, except to stay in touch. A friendship might last, if you water it; otherwise, it's mostly fond memories...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Potty View Post
    What to do ?
    Be grateful for the friendship - keep in touch as long as you both are comfortable and welcoming. Even if all goes quiet, send a Birthday card or Christmas card with a brief personal message.

    Life inevitably moves on in all things. Don't be sad if you drift apart - be happy for the good times and remember them well.

    There was a time before you knew that friend.
    You existed OK then, and you will in future if regular contact wanes.

    With a positive outlook, Life compensates very well.
    If you ride or just dream of it ...
    http://www.advrider.com/forums/showthread.php?t=533442

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tony P View Post
    Life inevitably moves on in all things. Don't be sad if you drift apart - be happy for the good times and remember them well.

    There was a time before you knew that friend.
    You existed OK then, and you will in future if regular contact wanes.

    With a positive outlook, Life compensates very well.
    People, did you hear that? Isn't it amazing?
    Tony, I am running to read your forum statistics to know about you.

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    I've had different kinds of friendship: from short, intense one, where you practically live each other's lives, to the ones whose steady if small fire had been burning and burning for years. The former quickly reached their climax and went into decline by us drifting apart, the latter will stay for good, I'm sure. The main thing is to be happy for everything life gives you, and even sadness about losing touch with friend is good, because it signifies the time to move on.

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    If both parties don't make an effort to stay in touch (and it's never been easier than these days, with Skype and email and whatnot), then they're not real friends anyway...

    But people drift apart, you grow up and pursue your own life and different interests. Sometimes, and I think very often, this means you'll slowly have less and less in common with old friends.

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    Thinking on a tangent - what is a friend and how do you define one?

    One test could be, to be able to be with them in silence and not feel uncomfortable.

    Ideas?
    If you ride or just dream of it ...
    http://www.advrider.com/forums/showthread.php?t=533442

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tony P View Post
    Thinking on a tangent - what is a friend and how do you define one?

    One test could be, to be able to be with them in silence and not feel uncomfortable.

    Ideas?
    A friend is a person who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

    And friendship is one mind in two bodies.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Potty View Post
    Have you ever felt that you are losing your friend just because your and his/her life has changed, maybe you are geographically far from each other, or just don't have enough time to get together or even chat online? I know it happens often when you have a family/kids and start to focus on your private life. Or your career is eating you up. But friendship is a damn good thing in life which cannot be replaced by anything else. What to do ?
    Dear Potty,

    There are acquaintances, so called friends, and true friends, I understand that you talk about the last ones, true friends.

    Well one of my favourite quotes is : " A true friend is one who knows all about you, and loves you just the same"

    No matter what happens, the true friendship will survive.

    I have over 400 contacts... acquaintances... I can call them, I can text them, I can meet them, but once it becomes personal they back up, dont understand or dont care at all, but luckely there is one special name in there, my true friend.

    We spend so much time together, but ... he got married, has three kids now, and we dont see eachother often, dont call eachother often, dont text eachother often, we entered a new level of live, marriage , kids, working, .... its sad.... but you know, when he is in trouble, or needs to talk, or the way around, we take or make time to listen, or to meet, he is always there for me, and so am I for him... our hearts are in peace because we know whatever happens, we will be there for one and other...

    I can tell you stories but not here and now, but let me tell you this, real friends stick together, maybe the contact is gone, but when the alarm bell goes off, she or he will be there...

    Our lives have become complicated, we need 48 h days to do all we can do, and especialy to have quality time with the people we love and care about... but once again, my heart is in a state of peace, my friend is in my heart, and when iam in bed, tired, thinking about my day, the future, his face pops up once and a while, and im pretty sure he does the same, when we wake up the bussy day starts and we forget to call or text...
    Take care,
    jim

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    A friend is someone who is there for you, and who you are there for.

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    A good friend will come bail you out of jail, but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying...'Damn, that was fun!

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    Jim, guys, thank you for your posts.
    Of course I mean certain people who I consider true friends. We know each other like forever. The first one I met when I was 8, the second - when I was 15. On the one hand yes, I know that whatever happens they will stand by my side. They proved it many times. Their support is available 24/7 if needed. But thank God I don't need it most of the time. I just need to feel their presence, that's all, that they are in my life. But sometimes it seems to me that marital/financial/other status is breaking us up. Our life became too different.
    Well, what about the idea "Women friendship does NOT exist"? Does anyone agree?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ibanez View Post
    A good friend will come bail you out of jail, but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying...'Damn, that was fun!
    I guess it is not about women. Shit...

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    Well, what about the idea "Women friendship does NOT exist"? Does anyone agree?
    A true friend is a rare occurrence even among males, mostly people want to just use each other or have fun together. I would say a true friend is whom you can call at 4 at night and say: "Man, I am in real trouble on the other part of the town, come to this address:bla-bla and bring a kitchen knife or some other weapon, you might need it here.", and he would actually come to you without even asking questions. I have probably not more than 2 people like that in the whole world.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MOSCOWFOREVER2000 View Post
    Dear Potty,

    There are acquaintances, so called friends, and true friends, I understand that you talk about the last ones, true friends.

    Well one of my favourite quotes is : " A true friend is one who knows all about you, and loves you just the same"

    No matter what happens, the true friendship will survive.

    I have over 400 contacts... acquaintances... I can call them, I can text them, I can meet them, but once it becomes personal they back up, dont understand or dont care at all, but luckely there is one special name in there, my true friend.

    We spend so much time together, but ... he got married, has three kids now, and we dont see eachother often, dont call eachother often, dont text eachother often, we entered a new level of live, marriage , kids, working, .... its sad.... but you know, when he is in trouble, or needs to talk, or the way around, we take or make time to listen, or to meet, he is always there for me, and so am I for him... our hearts are in peace because we know whatever happens, we will be there for one and other...

    I can tell you stories but not here and now, but let me tell you this, real friends stick together, maybe the contact is gone, but when the alarm bell goes off, she or he will be there...

    Our lives have become complicated, we need 48 h days to do all we can do, and especialy to have quality time with the people we love and care about... but once again, my heart is in a state of peace, my friend is in my heart, and when iam in bed, tired, thinking about my day, the future, his face pops up once and a while, and im pretty sure he does the same, when we wake up the bussy day starts and we forget to call or text...
    Take care,
    jim
    Eloquently put.... My beliefs and sentiments EXACTLY!

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