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Moscow Wolf
27-05-2004, 08:04
It is when it runs out at 08.00 am in the morning! Thoroughly pi$$ed off about it I am. Just thought I'd share that with you I did. I'm on show again in two hours when the Zoo opens. A Wolf licking his balls with a hang over no doubt. I'll dig a big hole and bury my head in it - No comments please! :(

Ned Kelly
27-05-2004, 08:09
That's one of the saddest stories I've read. You poor blighter.:p

At least you're not at work at 8am though!

Moscow Wolf
27-05-2004, 08:36
If I was, I'm half an hour late already!

Alethea
27-05-2004, 09:20
Hey, Wolf,

it's a shanty for you :p


Nose, nose, jolly red red nose,
And what gave thee thy jolly red nose
Cinnamon, and ginger, nutmeg and cloves,
And that gave me my jolly red nose.

I'll not have a woman who'd never been tried,
But give me a wanton to lie by my side,
And this I do use as a rule of my Life,
That wanton is best who's another man's wife.

Cookoo, Cookoo, to whom drinks though, sir nave to thee
This song is well sung and I make you a vow,
That he is a nave that drinketh now...


and so on

Alethea
27-05-2004, 09:25
And this one for Ned:p

In South Australia I was born!
Heave away! Haul away!
South Australia round Cape Horn!
We're bound for South Australia!


As I walked out one morning fair,
It's there I met Miss Nancy Blair.

I shook her up, I shook her down,
I shook her round and round the town.

There only thing that grieves me mind,
Is leaving Miss Nancy Blair behind.

And as you wallop round Cape Horn,
You'll wish to Christ you'd never been born!


Oh, rock and roll me over boys,
Let's get this damn job over boys.

DPG
27-05-2004, 17:05
Hmmmm, well at least I now know why you aren't answering my SMS's today you alcoholic you?!;)

And yeah, whiskey (and whisky for that matter - I'll get you a bottle if you can tell me the difference!) is a depressant...you told me yourself that fearful Monday a couple of months ago, where due to a startling act of synchronicity, we were both in separate places at death's door with bone-crunching hangovers!!!;)

Jose L Piedra
10-06-2004, 19:58
It`s a depressant when I can`t get to a bottle of it. :)

Or they only have Bells.

Surok
10-06-2004, 20:02
depressant maybe - but it's sure as hell helping me work at the moment!

Smurfette
10-06-2004, 23:02
All alcoholic drinks are depressants, have you ever had drunken conversations at 2am about how crap the world is, and how unfair life is. Also pointless philosophsing and deep and meaningful conversations were you suddenly seem to know a fantastic amount about what is wrong with everything.

Alcohol supresses brain function so you feel depressed.

Do you know that you have to give alcoholics tranquilizers when they are detoxing because the lack of alcohol in the blood causes the neurones in the brain to go nuts and then you start seizing.

If you ever get hold of laughing gas, its a much better plan, feel drunk within a minute or so, wears off pretty quickly and no hangover.

Much better than whiskey or even whiskey if you insist on drinking that.

Matt Bury
11-06-2004, 04:27
All the really fun, hangover-free, happy stuff is illegal though. I think the legislators just want us to be miserable.

Oh, well. Back to the bottle I suppose...

Zephyr
11-06-2004, 06:30
Whiskey River, take my mind
Don't let a memory talk to me
Whiskey River, don't run dry
You're all I got, take care of me
I'm drowning in a Whiskey River
Bathing my memory's mind in the wetness of its soul
Feeling the amber current flowing from my mind
To warm an empty heart you left so cold
Willie Nelson

Smurfette
11-06-2004, 15:03
Laughing gas isn't illegal you just need a doctor to prescribe it here (UK). Its used for pain relief in labour. There are some pesky side effects with long term use though....

Matt Bury
13-06-2004, 09:10
Originally posted by Smurfette
Laughing gas isn't illegal you just need a doctor to prescribe it here (UK). Its used for pain relief in labour. There are some pesky side effects with long term use though....

Yeah, there's plenty of stuff out there that is perfectly legal. Ephidrine is as powerful a stimulant as amphetamine, in Swtizerland doctors can legally prescribe LSD (just what for I've got no idea!?), magic mushrooms are legal (in England) as long as you don't supply anyone with them or try to preserve them in any way...

...my favourite one is the Australian cane toad story I heard. It produces a toxin on it's skin as a defence which in small doses is extremely halucinogenic so the Australian government has passed a law making it illegal to lick the toads. I can just picture a Monty Python court scene for this one - John Cleese as the judge, Michael Palin the acused, Graham Chapman the prosecuting barrister...

Can any Australians out there confirm or deny the existence of such laws?

Smurfette
13-06-2004, 14:46
Originally posted by Matt Bury
Yeah, there's plenty of stuff out there that is perfectly legal. Ephidrine is as powerful a stimulant as amphetamine, in Swtizerland doctors can legally prescribe LSD (just what for I've got no idea!?), magic mushrooms are legal (in England) as long as you don't supply anyone with them or try to preserve them in any way...

...my favourite one is the Australian cane toad story I heard. It produces a toxin on it's skin as a defence which in small doses is extremely halucinogenic so the Australian government has passed a law making it illegal to lick the toads. I can just picture a Monty Python court scene for this one - John Cleese as the judge, Michael Palin the acused, Graham Chapman the prosecuting barrister...

Can any Australians out there confirm or deny the existence of such laws?

You're right about the mushrooms, I have aquaintances who have spent interesting evenings in various parts of north wales with the aid of a mushroom omlette or two!

DPG
13-06-2004, 14:55
Ephedrine (and it's resulting active inigredient Ephedra) are in fact illegal in many places (Russia I believe being one of them). It is naturally occuring in some plant species and has the effect of accelaring the central nervous system and in particular the metabolism - thus providing insight as to why it's principal users are bodybuilders who wish to become more 'cut'and people wishing to lose weight (fat) while they sit around watching television.

Potential side effects are many...especiall when taken in the form of the (selfmade) 'bodybuilders' favourite the "ECA stack" namely, Ephedrine, Caffeine and Aspirin mixed together in order to each act as a catalyst for the others...the thought alone makes me feel nauseous!

Smurfette
13-06-2004, 15:00
Originally posted by DPG
Ephedrine (and it's resulting active inigredient Ephedra) are in fact illegal in many places (Russia I believe being one of them). It is naturally occuring in some plant species and has the effect of accelaring the central nervous system and in particular the metabolism - thus providing insight as to why it's principal users are bodybuilders who wish to become more 'cut'and people wishing to lose weight (fat) while they sit around watching television.

Potential side effects are many...especiall when taken in the form of the (selfmade) 'bodybuilders' favourite the "ECA stack" namely, Ephedrine, Caffeine and Aspirin mixed together in order to each act as a catalyst for the others...the thought alone makes me feel nauseous!

I am very impressed with your knowledge, it's very hard on the heart though, which may explain why body builders in particular have early, fatal, heart attacks. Mr Schwarzenegger has certainly suffered cardiac problems, not that I would suggest in any way that he had used anything similar to help him train.....;)

DPG
13-06-2004, 15:06
The heart problems international standard bodybuilders are more as a result of the Anabolics they take and the strain that the enlarged heart comes under.

Like you though, I am certainly not insinuating in any way that Arnold ever used steroids - it was the egg whites, protein shakes and chicken breasts that made him that size, wasn't it??!;)

Smurfette
13-06-2004, 15:12
But of course, a healthy balenced diet can make anyone look like that.

Steroids do affeect the heart but also have a great effect on reducing the size of certain bits of anatomy about which the male of the species is often very proud.

Ephedrine has similar effect on the body to adrenaline-so when you are nervous you feel your heart pumping because it has been told by your nerves that it may need to get blood around to muscles as fast as possible - fight or flight - so if you mimick that with another agent to enable you to train harder/perform better it's natural that your heart can no longer cope with it - taking Speed has a similar effect.

Moscow Wolf
13-06-2004, 15:35
I lost count how many bottles I've drank since I started this miserable thread!

Jose L Piedra
13-06-2004, 16:46
Spent this weekend in a country pub locked in waaaaay after last orders with a great selection of single malts - Glenfarclas, Laphroaig, Glenlivet, Glenmorangie, Isle of Jura, Dalwhinnie, Talisker - got chatting to a very nice young lady (who I charmed to pieces - if only I was 15 years younger !! ) - AND the barman, on seeing me with a Cuban cigar in my mouth, gave me a FREE Diplomaticos #2 and asked me for my opinion on it ( ! ) - Depressed ? Despressed ??? I was bloody ecstatic. :D

Zephyr
14-06-2004, 00:41
Originally posted by Jose L Piedra
Spent this weekend in a country pub locked in waaaaay after last orders with a great selection of single malts - Glenfarclas, Laphroaig, Glenlivet, Glenmorangie, Isle of Jura, Dalwhinnie, Talisker - got chatting to a very nice young lady (who I charmed to pieces - if only I was 15 years younger !! ) - AND the barman, on seeing me with a Cuban cigar in my mouth, gave me a FREE Diplomaticos #2 and asked me for my opinion on it ( ! ) - Depressed ? Despressed ??? I was bloody ecstatic. :D
Now that my friend is Livin'.
I'm actually a bourbon man myself but I can certainly relate to a good single malt.
I just have to make do with this damm California wine for the moment. 1997 Russian River Zinfandel ahhhh .

Jose L Piedra
14-06-2004, 01:09
Ahh, Zeph, I had a great weekend and just wish a few people from this site were here to share it. Wonderful location, weather, company - to say little of the drinks and smokes. ;-)))) Bourbon !!! Y`know, JD No. 7 doesn`t do too much for me - too sweet - I like Jim Beam and on the shopping list for next week is a bottle of Woodford Reserve. You can also get Four Roses here in the UK and I`ve heard it`s a good, light bourbon. Wish I had my own pub. I`d never go out. ;-)))))))) And I raise my glass to you all - cheers !!! But whisky a depressant ? Never. ;-))))))

Try Sake for a "friendly" drink, but ohhhhhh GOD the hangovers later....... :D

Matt Bury
14-06-2004, 20:53
Jose, I was once given a bottle of Evan Williams single barrel bourbon. I have only one word to describe it: smoooooooth!!!

A lot of people tell me that Old Grandad is a pretty good bourbon too and I'm quite fond of Wild Turkey.

I think it's pretty difficult to get hold of the really good bourbons in England, is it like that in Moscow?

Zephyr
15-06-2004, 01:30
Next to impossible to find good bourbon in Moscow, by the same Token they want 50$ for a bottle of Gzelka here.
Jose if you can find it Corner Creek single barrel reserve ( bottled in a wine bottle) man o man, this is life at it's most civillized state.

Jose L Piedra
15-06-2004, 02:15
Hehe - I`ll try looking, but Moscow is a long way from here. Maybe I`ll strike lucky. Thanks, fellas ! Perhaps there`s a "postal business opportunity" here, eh ? - something like Oddbins (UK) in Moscow ? www.oddbins.com - specialist "off licence" - "liquor store" ?

I`m amazed if they don`t have something like that already....

Jose L Piedra
15-06-2004, 02:20
Honestly, I read this thread title and was amazed. Like cigars, pipe tobacco and - WIMMIN !! - whisky`s one of the great pleasures in life. I can only think that if someone goes out and buys the cheapest, nastiest scotch possible and then drinks it with Coke...... (horrors !! ) then they ARE going to get depressed. I dunno, perhaps I drink differently than other folks, but - I like to get a really fine whisky made with care and attention, sit back and enjoy it. Either a smooth Speyside Glenlivet or a peaty, heavy Laphroaig I can just sit back with a glass brimming with ice and the best scotch you can get (within reason ($$$) ) - spark up a Cuban stogie that`s been asleep in the humidor for 6 months - and I`m in heaven. ;-)))))))))) Half a pint of Bells and 20 Bensons and I`d be depressed, though, that`s for sure............ :D

pengwn9
15-06-2004, 02:31
Originally posted by Jose L Piedra
[B - got chatting to a very nice young lady (who I charmed to pieces - if only I was 15 years younger !! ) [/B]

Dave, you can never be 15 years younger. But you don't need to be.

You just remain charming. It's much more important. Charm will win over looks and age every time, I can assure you.

Women have different criteria. Looks are less important than character. We'll go for a loveable guy over an asshole stud any day any time. Looks are transient, soul is forever.

Zephyr
15-06-2004, 03:38
Wow!!!! Judging by what they are getting for wine from California there at oddbins, I think I could make a good living on what I could bring in with carry on :-)))) But seriously, that idea has crossed my mind also. PM me Jose.
Jim Beam is also one of my favorites, that along with old Crow, not too expensive but with great character.

Toofuses
15-06-2004, 08:49
You ain't kidding Zeph - $32 for a bottle of Kendall Jackson Chardonnay over here in the stores.

Jose L Piedra
15-06-2004, 15:41
Ludicrous, isn`t it ? As I mentioned- thirty quid for a bottle of Johnnie Walker Black Label in the provinces a LONG time ago...... OK, so there`s duty and import tax to pay, but that`s just profiteering.

I happen to know some folks in the wine and spirit trade here who do volume shipping, by the way.....

Polia Ivanova
15-06-2004, 16:52
Look at this - I stole it from Punch

I try to cut on drinking now - yesterday had alcohol free day (not a single unit). But I like Glenlivet and some Irish whiskeis although prefer Cognac. Russian prices are horrible - the 0.5l bottle of VS Martell which cost less than 15 pounds here in the supermarket will cost up to 45 pounds in Moscow.

Smurfette
16-06-2004, 02:43
Enough with the Whisky! I have just discovered my sister has brought me mexican tequila and cuban rum from her travels, I am very excited. Pity the weathers broken here, can't really have the full experience, but I'll try.

Jose L Piedra
16-06-2004, 03:18
;) Polia, I`ll buy you a Glenlivet sometime, neighbour. :D

Ahhh, Smurfette - Tequila ??? Not the same- I had a bottle once with some friends and we all ended up in some curious mood - like being in a Western gunfight. ;) Cuban rum - never had it, but I know where I can get some and I may just try it one day. With a cigar, of course.

The happiest drink I`ve had yet is sake - really makes for a good evening, but a very bad morning afterwards. But. Give me the fogs, peaty glens and clear burns and brooks of Bonnie Scotland any day of the week. Preferably every day of the week. ;-))))))

"Drink problem - only one mouth" :)

Zephyr
16-06-2004, 09:39
I once brought a bottle of Tequila back from Mexico ( the kind with the worm in the bottle) and a friend and I consumed said bottle: upon arriving at the end I inquired on what was to be done with the worm. Friend said it should be eaten, and a religious experiance would be forthcoming,we split the worm.....I spent the night in front of his house on the ground and met a fellow I believe was Jesse James and barely escaped being shot.
A chemistry professor of mine was schooling us in the fine art of avoiding hangovers, explaining that the long molecules in Rum make it very hard to digest and dissipate effects thus very bad hangovers,:-)))))))Make mine whiskey !!!! :-)

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 00:22
The trick to avoiding hangovers is to drink clear drinks, eg vodka, but to intersperse with water to counteract dehydration - thats the hard bit. I only get to drinking water after I've had far to much alcohol to drink. Curse those student bars, curse them. Unfortunately for the moment getting home while pissed is a problem, soon to change, i really miss living in a city, took a move to the country to prove it but I'm a big city girl at heart.

When I get said tequilla and rum, I shall test them both and report the resulting hangovers.

pengwn9
17-06-2004, 01:02
The most miserable awful hangover I've ever had--red red wine.

Never ever touch the stuff anymore. Cabernet Sauvignon--truely the Grapes of Wrath.

Nothing can compare to the screaming headache and full blown wretchedness left by an evening with too much Cabernet. Don't go there. Stay away! It hurts even to remember it. Ooohhhh. Ooowww. No.

Moscow Wolf
17-06-2004, 01:20
3 bottles of that and half a bottle of strong cough medicine, best night's sleep I ever had, floating above my bed I was. The secret is plenty and more water. One glass of wine and two glasses of water.

pengwn9
17-06-2004, 01:22
Wine and strong cough medicine.....you are one sick puppy. Yeow.

DPG
17-06-2004, 01:25
Ohhh!!! Best (worst!) hangovers - I'll start a new thread!!!:)

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 01:27
I always find paracetamol (acetaminophen) and Baileys (I'm a girl I'm allowed to like it) is a good combination for a peaceful night. Not great for the liver but 4 years as a student probably sentanced mine anyhow. What else to you do with a pharmacy degree other than learn what you can mix!

Moscow Wolf
17-06-2004, 01:28
I was ill, I was only supposed to take a spoonful, but it was a dark Hotel room and well you know I kind've cracked it open and slugged it down. I was told it contains something the Druggies use when they're coming off the hard stuff. Did me a treat it did.

DPG
17-06-2004, 01:31
Wait, wait, I said I'd start a new one (at the same time a chatting to 3 friends in the UK and one here on the msn messenger)!!

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 01:32
hummmmm perhaps more light next time. Can't have tasted too bad though.

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 01:34
Originally posted by DPG
Wait, wait, I said I'd start a new one (at the same time a chatting to 3 friends in the UK and one here on the msn messenger)!!

Wow male multitasking must ba a sight to behold!!!!;)

pengwn9
17-06-2004, 02:07
Yeah. He can watch 'footie' and drink beer at the same time.

Is that multitasking?

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 02:08
well you have to allow that he is male, it's about advanced as they get!

pengwn9
17-06-2004, 02:28
Bravo! A toast to the men and all their simple minded glory!

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 02:30
They are wonderful creations. Besides if they were any more complex they might start to understand us. Its the all important second X chromasome.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 02:57
Anyone for plug wiring ? Oh, me. :D

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:00
I learned to wire a plug when I was about 10, comes of being an engineers daughter, men have their uses, wiring plugs is not one of them.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:02
Yes, we`re useful at teaching women to wire plugs, I`ll give you that one. :)

DPG
17-06-2004, 03:03
[Outnumbered and outgunned, our hero calls for Jose to cover the side flank with the heavy machine gun as he runs to the trenches for cover from the firing and snipers].

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:04
fair point, but my father is the previous generation, eventually men will be obsolete, its the natural progression of life.

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:05
Originally posted by DPG
[Outnumbered and outgunned, our hero calls for Jose to cover the side flank with the heavy machine gun as he runs to the trenches for cover from the firing and snipers].

Can't hold his own eh?

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:06
LOL !! DPG, I think we`d better BOTH get in there with the tin hats on......... better throw all these first line female soldiers first - oh !! There aren`t any - or coal miners....... I`ll shut up and have a whisky, I think. Care to join me ??

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:08
Given that most military agression is started by men, don't think we'll need to fling soldiers at pointless wars.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:08
Originally posted by Smurfette
fair point, but my father is the previous generation, eventually men will be obsolete, its the natural progression of life.

;-) Ahhh, Smurfette - OK, let`s forget this is a whisky thread and may I ask you how life was down the mine today ? I can`t imagine a coal mine run by women - though I`d love to see the pit showers. ;-)))

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:09
Step back in time- coal mining is hardly the industry it was....

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:10
Originally posted by Smurfette
Given that most military agression is started by men, don't think we'll need to fling soldiers at pointless wars.

Really ? Open up the history books and you`ll find innumerate examples of women in ancient times who were as vicious, grasping, duplicitous and outright *nasty* as any Roman potentate..... more so in a lot of cases. And wars are about power, not agression.

Take one office full of women workers and the back stabbing, spitefulness and general bitchy behaviour is unbelievable....... you`re even worse than us fellas - you should drink more single malt scotch. ;-)))))

DPG
17-06-2004, 03:10
Whisky, now there's a thought, and there's a bottle of Laphroiag 10 year old behind my laptop...

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:12
You like that too huh, I have a bottle and a half belonging to my ex in my kitchen. Suppose he'll be back to collect it at some point.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:12
Originally posted by Smurfette
Step back in time- coal mining is hardly the industry it was....

You`d have nice frilly covers on all the lanterns and be terrified of breaking your nails. ;)

Mining is a massive part of any countries` industry - especially Russia and the Ukraine.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:14
Originally posted by DPG
Whisky, now there's a thought, and there's a bottle of Laphroiag 10 year old behind my laptop...

A fine peaty concoction, DPG. :-) Worth coming out of the trench for ?? :)

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:14
Fair enough, all men can be employed doing heavy industry while women run the show.

I don't do frilly stuff, really isn't me.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:17
OK, we`ll make dungarees en masse. :D And what you`ve described seems very much to be the status quo at the moment, Smurfette - women DO run the show. Didn`t you notice ? :D You may not have the outright blatant power, but........... show me a woman who didn`t get her own way......... I raise my glass to you with a charming smile :D

DPG
17-06-2004, 03:17
Originally posted by Jose L Piedra
A fine peaty concoction, DPG. :-) Worth coming out of the trench for ?? :)

I was contemplating staying hidden, but I have to leave the trench to get the ice!! - I'll get the VC for this you know!:-)

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:18
I learnt that from drinking whisky, y`know, he said, trying to get back on thread. :)

Moscow Wolf
17-06-2004, 03:19
Get shot more like, best leave it for me, I can afford to be shot I'm old and grey (and thirsty).

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:23
:D - Wolfie, I`m going to try and make it to DPG`s trench with a satchel full of ice and some life saving cigars. If I don`t make it, please tell the wife, the girlfriend, the mistress and my secretary what happened (with a few minor embellisments) and I`m leaving it all to myself to confuse the taxman..... catch you later and keep your head down, for God`s sake :D

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:27
I can recommend some good accountants.
Am calling truce, all ok with that? Can't be bothered to argue the merits of men or lack thereof anymore. Already going to need several coffees before I start work tomorrow, wouldn't want to kill someone, bad form.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:31
Truce !! Now we can all have a WHISKY and get back on thread. ;-)) Care to join me, Miss Smurfette, Sargeant Wolfie and Captain DPG, VC ? :D Mine`s a large one. Or so I`d like to think. :D

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:33
On ice please, not a big fan of peaty, but do appreciate, have tasted various barrels from the scottish whisky society over the years.

Smurfette
17-06-2004, 03:35
I shall leave you to the delights of a fine drink, g'night. :smurf:

Moscow Wolf
17-06-2004, 03:55
Sergeant!! I'm at least a Major Disaster.

Jose L Piedra
17-06-2004, 03:58
I`m hoping for a promotion to Latrine Attendant second class - I get two stripes on my shovel. :D Ahh, the weighty responsibility of command....