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penka
28-08-2015, 10:12
I've noted getting married for women is nr 1 priority, falling in love - nr 5, to have a career - nr 6 and buying own place to live - nr 8.

For men getting married is nr 2, falling in love - nr 8, to have a career - nr 4, buying own place to live - nr 5.

http://www.themoscowtimes.com/news/article/russians-consider-marrying-giving-birth-and-education-most-important-things/528835.html

Benedikt
28-08-2015, 11:52
and what is Nr1 for the russian man?

AstarD
28-08-2015, 12:00
Most Important Things to Do Before Turning 30
Here are the things Russians consider men and women should do before turning 30, according to the poll conducted by Levada Center.

For Men:
To get an education – 65%
To get married – 56%
To serve in the military – 55%
To have a career – 52%
To buy a place to live – 46%
To have children – 40%
To buy a car – 30%
To fall in love – 26%
To start a business – 20%
To travel – 17%
To learn to cook – 9%
To take part in charity – 9%

For Women:
To get married – 77%
To have children – 75%
To get education – 60%
To learn how to cook – 52%
To fall in love – 32%
To have a career – 19%
To travel – 18%
To buy a place to live – 14%
To take part in charity – 8%
To buy a car – 6%
To start a business – 4%
To serve in the military – 3%

Benedikt
28-08-2015, 17:07
very interesting, serving in the army comes before career? wonder WHO they were interviewing?
good to see about education. because if you are well educated, all the other things will be much easier for you.

FatAndy
28-08-2015, 18:22
very interesting, serving in the army comes before career? wonder WHO they were interviewing?

Probably such guys? :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1idTSSc_7Ts

FatAndy
28-08-2015, 18:23
Or these?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8f0DZLPC7Y

rusmeister
28-08-2015, 18:52
Well, on the most important things, it looks like common sense (except the "serve in the military" part. That looks like BS to me).
Getting married, having children and being able to support that family (and education, or what passes for it is, rightly or wrongly, widely perceived to enable this) ARE the most essential things for humanity to exist and build anything resembling a civilization.
We Westerners are the ones who have gone relatively (or absolutely) insane in thinking marriage, children, and responsible fatherhood dispensable.

penka
28-08-2015, 19:13
Women priorities getting married and getting children, education is on the third place. They plan to work as shop assistances or marry rich? Clearly, becoming self-employed is not on the list of priorities. It's wonderful with family and kids, but all that costs money. Maybe, they count on the state to deliver?

None of the genders priorities getting a flat/house on their own. They got wealthy parents that will get them that or will habitually live with parents, grandparents and their children in the same flat?

And I'm frankly at loss with marrying first, THEN falling in love. Shouldn't it be the other way around?

Traveling as a way of broadening one's horizons for the young people doesn't fly high either.

FatAndy
28-08-2015, 19:44
And I'm frankly at loss with marrying first, THEN falling in love. Shouldn't it be the other way around?
:D You're the romantic soul, dear!

penka
28-08-2015, 19:51
:D You're the romantic soul, dear!

Hmm... You are so cynical, Andy!:(

FatAndy
28-08-2015, 20:01
Hmm... You are so cynical, Andy!:(
No, RL is sure I'm romantic too! :D

natlee
28-08-2015, 21:02
Sounds as though I fit right in! Two kids, no career - unmarried but in love though! :D

vossy7
28-08-2015, 21:53
[QUOTE=penka;1428263]
And I'm frankly at loss with marrying first, THEN falling in love. Shouldn't it be the other way around?

Fully with you on that one Pen, looks like lots of ticks in boxes without any meaning to them !

penka
28-08-2015, 22:19
[QUOTE=penka;1428263]
And I'm frankly at loss with marrying first, THEN falling in love. Shouldn't it be the other way around?

Fully with you on that one Pen, looks like lots of ticks in boxes without any meaning to them !

On the contrary, it might very well have a meaning to it, this little survey, that is.

For example, it might reflect social norms and social pressure to get married by the certain age (or you'll get too old and nobody will want you).
Desire to marry too young might reflect social problems, like getting away from the control of one's family.
Putting marriage before a natural desire for an emotional bond might mean a pragmatic attitude to a relationship (someone will pay the bills and provide financial security).

Maybe, the high divorce rate in Russia is a backside of this attitude to partnership, I don't know.

rusmeister
29-08-2015, 09:02
Women priorities getting married and getting children, education is on the third place. They plan to work as shop assistances or marry rich? Clearly, becoming self-employed is not on the list of priorities. It's wonderful with family and kids, but all that costs money. Maybe, they count on the state to deliver?

None of the genders priorities getting a flat/house on their own. They got wealthy parents that will get them that or will habitually live with parents, grandparents and their children in the same flat?

And I'm frankly at loss with marrying first, THEN falling in love. Shouldn't it be the other way around?

Traveling as a way of broadening one's horizons for the young people doesn't fly high either.

I think I am one of the last English speakers alive who remembers that gender is not sex, and that sex is not an action, but a state of being.

But I do agree with you that if one must support oneself, the goal ought to be self-employment.

I could shock you with Chesterton's zinger on travel narrowing the mind, but doubt you could handle it. :)

The only real purpose of "falling in love" can be compared to a car battery. The job of the battery is to start the car, nothing more. It's not intended for any other purpose; indeed, it needs to be charged by the generator while the car is in operation. So it is with marriage. Falling in love enables the marriage to take place. But to maintain the marriage, the couple must begin to generate, or in the most literal sense, make love, and it must most often be produced in the absence of romantic feelings. The vital thing for marriage is learning to love your spouse in a deeper sense than "falling in love" ever does. The latter is a rather superficial thing, completely unable to imagine or deal with the quarrels and disappointments of a lifelong marriage.

So falling in love is not really essential if the marriage is started by other means (arranged marriage, for instance). The vital thing for a happy marriage is that learning to love the person you are married to.

penka
29-08-2015, 10:02
I think I am one of the last English speakers alive who remembers that gender is not sex, and that sex is not an action, but a state of being.

But I do agree with you that if one must support oneself, the goal ought to be self-employment.

I could shock you with Chesterton's zinger on travel narrowing the mind, but doubt you could handle it. :)

The only real purpose of "falling in love" can be compared to a car battery. The job of the battery is to start the car, nothing more. It's not intended for any other purpose; indeed, it needs to be charged by the generator while the car is in operation. So it is with marriage. Falling in love enables the marriage to take place. But to maintain the marriage, the couple must begin to generate, or in the most literal sense, make love, and it must most often be produced in the absence of romantic feelings. The vital thing for marriage is learning to love your spouse in a deeper sense than "falling in love" ever does. The latter is a rather superficial thing, completely unable to imagine or deal with the quarrels and disappointments of a lifelong marriage.

So falling in love is not really essential if the marriage is started by other means (arranged marriage, for instance). The vital thing for a happy marriage is that learning to love the person you are married to.

I agree completely on the marriage passage, rus.

I was talking more of it is normal to have feelings to the person one is going to marry. Whilst once one is married, falling in love looks like one bizarre goal.

rusmeister
29-08-2015, 13:04
I agree completely on the marriage passage, rus.

I was talking more of it is normal to have feelings to the person one is going to marry. Whilst once one is married, falling in love looks like one bizarre goal.
Well, we should be doing things to make a continuous "falling in love" possible, at least.

rusmeister
29-08-2015, 13:07
http://www.theatlantic.com/daily-dish/archive/2009/05/how-travel-narrows-the-mind/202307/

And we pat ourselves on the back, congratulating ourselves on how "broad-minded" we are thanks to our travels...

Nobbynumbnuts
29-08-2015, 16:25
That's the biggest load of f*cking twaddle i've ever read..:rolleyes:

vossy7
29-08-2015, 17:49
That's the biggest load of f*cking twaddle i've ever read..:rolleyes:

Which part Nobbs ?

Nobbynumbnuts
29-08-2015, 18:11
Which part Nobbs ?

Come on, all of it. Tourism is a bad thing? Bloody hell, religious people! :rolleyes:

Alan65
29-08-2015, 19:46
Vodka

penka
29-08-2015, 20:36
Vodka? You should go easy on it, Alan;)

rusmeister
30-08-2015, 05:54
That's the biggest load of f*cking twaddle i've ever read..:rolleyes:

You obviously didn't read it, in any sense of understanding anything - and I suspect you didn't even try to understand.

The only way you can show something is nonsense is by demonstrating what IS nonsense, and contrasting it with what is sense. You can't disagree with someone unless you can show that you understand them. If they are speaking Greek, for instance, it might be great sense and wisdom, and the trouble would be that you don't understand Greek.

Nobbynumbnuts
30-08-2015, 10:54
You obviously didn't read it, in any sense of understanding anything - and I suspect you didn't even try to understand.

The only way you can show something is nonsense is by demonstrating what IS nonsense, and contrasting it with what is sense. You can't disagree with someone unless you can show that you understand them. If they are speaking Greek, for instance, it might be great sense and wisdom, and the trouble would be that you don't understand Greek.

I already told you. You can talk like a doggy car salesman...and that's all it is, just talk.

rusmeister
30-08-2015, 13:13
This means that it is entirely fair to respond to all of your posts, comments and links with "That's the biggest load of f*cking twaddle i've ever read.."

Unless you desire to master rhetoric (in the classical sense), and to show that you can consider ideas that you disagree with, you will just be another unthinking person spouting opinions. To show that someone else is wrong, you have to show what right is and how the other person goes wrong.

Saying "it's just talk" indicates that you can't do that, making your opinion valueless to anyone not already thoroughly convinced by your own opinions.

Nobbynumbnuts
30-08-2015, 14:00
This means that it is entirely fair to respond to all of your posts, comments and links with "That's the biggest load of f*cking twaddle i've ever read..".............

Feel free but you won't be able to. It's not 3 paragraphs long and full of confuted twaddle! :winking:

rusmeister
30-08-2015, 18:12
Feel free but you won't be able to. It's not 3 paragraphs long and full of confuted twaddle! :winking:

That's the biggest load of ****** twaddle i've ever read..