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Miracle77777
29-11-2007, 16:54
What is the most important for you in your partner???
Smartness or sense of humour?
Beauty or honesty?
Is it important for you to what native he or she belonged?
Thanks in advance :goldy:

SalTheReturn
29-11-2007, 19:39
What is the most important for you in your partner???
Smartness or sense of humour?
Beauty or honesty?
Is it important for you to what native he or she belonged?
Thanks in advance :goldy:

smartness for sure and her social skills, i mean she must know how to behave in public

a common example it is when i bring a girl over to my friends and she does not introduce herself if i do not guide her through the process

Miracle77777
29-11-2007, 21:28
smartness for sure and her social skills, i mean she must know how to behave in public

a common example it is when i bring a girl over to my friends and she does not introduce herself if i do not guide her through the process

Excuse me...do you mean if you will not introduce her she need to stand with wide open eyes and smiling to all????:o

SalTheReturn
29-11-2007, 21:38
Excuse me...do you mean if you will not introduce her she need to stand with wide open eyes and smiling to all????:o

no, i mean that i have not got to guide her through the process but that she can just make a bit of effort and shake hands herself

i usually introduce but when there are 10 people around it is much easier she handle it herself

on the other hand when my girlfriend used to take me around with her friends, i have never waited a single second and went through the "lets get to know each other" process all on my own

and yes sometimes, it happens to men also, you gotta smile as a dumb

judging russia i would say that very few women were making the most natural thing when seeing new people "hi my name is....nice to meet you"

but i will tell you a thing, those who were doing that they were the girls my friends at the end of the night, would say "congratulation mate, she seems a nice girl"

dick
29-11-2007, 21:43
Sense of humor, If you have a good sense of humor you are smart.

Doesn't matter if she is honest.
She only has to be beautiful to me.

Doesn't matter where she is from or the color of her skin.

If I feel good next to her, I will be with her.

One Love, One Heart, One World.

ezik
29-11-2007, 21:50
What is the most important for you in your partner???
Smartness or sense of humour?
Beauty or honesty?
Is it important for you to what native he or she belonged?
Thanks in advance :goldy:

Smartness indicates a sense of humour.
Beauty and honesty do mix. Thank God.
She belongs here, but I would go anywhere with her. As she would go with me. And for now we stay here.
The most important in a partner is honesty. Without that, you just end up with hidden agendas and frustrations.
Honesty is difficult as you might hear (or confess) things that are not as were expecting. Still, it is the only way to truly know what you can count on. If you are honest, open and respectful, anything will be ok. As you as you are honest.

ezik
29-11-2007, 21:52
As to someone being native: I don't care. Being native is something imposed by others, rather than by love.

SalTheReturn
29-11-2007, 22:00
One Love, One Heart, One World.[/QUOTE]

is that from a commercial?:cool:

Albertina
29-11-2007, 22:50
What is most important for me in my partner is his full affection and dedication to me :clown:
of course he should have an IQ of at least 130. Andhave no major defects in appearance. Then he should be kind and nice, emotionally intelligent as well. Blond (I prefer), medium to tall in height, not too skinny and not overweight. Must be a good driver. Cooking would be a plus. Ideally he should earm more than I do (but it's difficult really... :p).
Well, I am not asking for too much, am i? :gorgeous:

Natkin
29-11-2007, 22:56
What is most important for me in my partner is his full affection and dedication to me :clown:
of course he should have an IQ of at least 130. Andhave no major defects in appearance. Then he should be kind and nice, emotionally intelligent as well. Blond (I prefer), medium to tall in height, not too skinny and not overweight. Must be a good driver. Cooking would be a plus. Ideally he should earm more than I do (but it's difficult really... :p).
Well, I am not asking for too much, am i? :gorgeous:

Not too much. You forgot some vital options:
-he lets you chat on phone with your girlfriends for hours
-he knows exactly what present to buy to you
-he doesn`t mind switch the football off
-and he knows your bra size!!!:fireworks:

SalTheReturn
30-11-2007, 00:05
Not too much. You forgot some vital options:
-he lets you chat on phone with your girlfriends for hours
-he knows exactly what present to buy to you
-he doesn`t mind switch the football off
-and he knows your bra size!!!:fireworks:

how bra size are calculated in russia?

in italy it is from a tiny 1 to a whopping 6th!!!:wavey:

average italian hot chick has a nice 3rd:gorgeous:

Albertina
30-11-2007, 00:30
Natkin, thank you for one important point.
He CANNOT be a soccer fan. That's just a show-stopper. Period.
:devilish:

Margo
30-11-2007, 00:45
But what instead of soccer (football). Do you accept any kind of hobby other then yourself? :)

TGP
30-11-2007, 01:55
Sincere, good sense of humor, a little above average intelligence, a bad boy (somewhat)..ah, I don't know what I want! But I see when he appears.

Albertina
30-11-2007, 08:58
But what instead of soccer (football). Do you accept any kind of hobby other then yourself? :)

Great point! I think he cannot have any time left for any hobbies after myself.
But calling myself a hobby is a bit small for me. I can't be a hobby, I should be all his life 24/7/365 :inlove::inlove::inlove:

By the way -> :fridaysign:

SalTheReturn
30-11-2007, 12:00
Great point! I think he cannot have any time left for any hobbies after myself.
But calling myself a hobby is a bit small for me. I can't be a hobby, I should be all his life 24/7/365 :inlove::inlove::inlove:

By the way -> :fridaysign:

are you russian?

if yes i must tell you those kind of statements are right the ones who make the average foreigner going like "russian girls are too demanding"

having a partner implies you also have your own life and not live with the pretense of a symbiosis

sad really

VladSkywolf
30-11-2007, 13:46
Wow, tough question. It's hard to think of only *one* important quality I look for in a partner since it's always been a combination of things.

Hmm... that being said however, I think that a great sense of humour is very important. A person can have many, many great qualities, but if they can't laugh at themselves, at me, the absurdities of life, genuinely funny things, etc, I would have to wonder what spark for life they have, their sense of adventure, and how happy they can really be. Besides, haven't you ever noticed how even less than average looking people can instantly look much more attractice when they smile and laugh - a genuine laugh that's reflected in their eyes? Yeah, if a person can't easily laugh (something I love to do) then for sure it's a turn off.

Other factors I look(ed) for:

- a measure of intelligence
- sincerity
- trust
- empathy
- independence (though not too independent ;))
- pleasing to look at
- chemistry

A short explanation of why for each...

Intelligence: stimulating conversation beyond gossip is important to me. Having a partner who's smart enough to help you solve problems is also a good thing, in my opinion. :)

Sincerity: others have touched upon why honesty is important, so I won't rehash that.

Trust: Not much to say here right? Can't live easily with someone who's always suspicious and lives by the motto "guilty until proven innocent!".

Empathy: If your partner cannot feel any empathy for others, how will they ever begin to understand how you feel about something? Being able to put yourself into someone else's shoes goes a long way...

Independence: No matter how many interests you share, there will always be those that you don't. People should be allowed to pursue their interests without interference from their partner (pay attention to me!). I also like it when they are capable of making decisions without always having to check with me first since sometimes it's necessary. You should also be able to engage in social activities that may not be appropriate for the both of you. As an example, my wife likes to get together with her girlfriends around once a week at their favorite cafe for (what else) coffee and gossip :) and I have no problem with that. On those far less frequent occasions where I get together with the guys, she says 'Have fun!' and only asks that I let her know where I'm at. Reasonable. :) Why far less frequent? My wife fit in so well with my circle of friends that they are now hers as well. I don't often desire to just 'get together with the guys', preferring instead our group of friends, which always includes girlfriends/wives, so of course my wife joins us. :) I have to agree with SalTheReturn on this one, having a partner means engaging in a partnership, not a clingy, co-dependent, symbiotic state. Been there, done that, and it ain't fun (nor healthy IMHO).

Looks: I admit it, a person has to be attractive to me despite the idealistic thinking of my younger years. The partner doesn't have to be good enough to pose on the latest issue of Cosmo or GQ, but they should at least be easy on the eyes.

Chemistry: Well, this can mean a lot of things, but I'm referring to sexual chemistry. If your partner has everything else but this is lacking, well, then they might as well be just a best friend. I am assuming, of course, that one or the other is still sexually active and has a healthy appetite. ;)

Okay, I think I'll shut up now. :D

Edit:
Just wanted to add: self-confidence. For me, it's an appealing quality.

Okay, now I'll really shut up!

iceman
30-11-2007, 14:06
What is the most important for you in your partner???
Smartness or sense of humour?
Beauty or honesty?
Is it important for you to what native he or she belonged?
Thanks in advance :goldy:

BJ technique
oh! almost forgot - she has got to take it up the bum

Albertina
30-11-2007, 19:31
are you russian?

if yes i must tell you those kind of statements are right the ones who make the average foreigner going like "russian girls are too demanding"

having a partner implies you also have your own life and not live with the pretense of a symbiosis

sad really


And most importantly he MUST have a sense of humour! :rant::rant::rant:

Miracle77777
30-11-2007, 21:32
Sense of humor, If you have a good sense of humor you are smart.

Doesn't matter if she is honest.
She only has to be beautiful to me.

Doesn't matter where she is from or the color of her skin.

If I feel good next to her, I will be with her.

One Love, One Heart, One World.

Big thanks for Romance note here :inlove:
Appreciate ^-*

Miracle77777
30-11-2007, 21:35
What is most important for me in my partner is his full affection and dedication to me :clown:
of course he should have an IQ of at least 130. Andhave no major defects in appearance. Then he should be kind and nice, emotionally intelligent as well. Blond (I prefer), medium to tall in height, not too skinny and not overweight. Must be a good driver. Cooking would be a plus. Ideally he should earm more than I do (but it's difficult really... :p).
Well, I am not asking for too much, am i? :gorgeous:

Absolutely not too much...I wish I could have such a clear imagination of my Ideal ^-*
Regards

Miracle77777
30-11-2007, 21:46
Smartness indicates a sense of humour.
Beauty and honesty do mix. Thank God.
She belongs here, but I would go anywhere with her. As she would go with me. And for now we stay here.
The most important in a partner is honesty. Without that, you just end up with hidden agendas and frustrations.
Honesty is difficult as you might hear (or confess) things that are not as were expecting. Still, it is the only way to truly know what you can count on. If you are honest, open and respectful, anything will be ok. As you as you are honest.

That's the thing - Honesty!!!!
Unfortunately it is very rare trait in humans relationships of all kinds :rant:
But thanks for admitting...

Clean32
30-11-2007, 21:49
found her, keeping her.

there are no words

Miracle77777
30-11-2007, 21:51
are you russian?

if yes i must tell you those kind of statements are right the ones who make the average foreigner going like "russian girls are too demanding"

having a partner implies you also have your own life and not live with the pretense of a symbiosis

sad really

Hey!! I can be demanding but I give you even more than that!! So I suppose it is absolutely fair when he could be with u when you are wish it ^-*
Yeap :gorgeous:

Clean32
30-11-2007, 22:07
Hey!! I can be demanding but I give you even more than that!! So I suppose it is absolutely fair when he could be with u when you are wish it ^-*
Yeap :gorgeous:

He ?? is Sal Gay, lol now thats a turn up for the books LOL

Miracle77777
02-12-2007, 23:43
He ?? is Sal Gay, lol now thats a turn up for the books LOL

Didn't mean it,,,,sorry for misunderstood :goblin:

SalTheReturn
03-12-2007, 01:12
found her, keeping her.

there are no words

maybe she does not have words too!!!:fireworks::(:bong:

Miracle77777
12-12-2007, 23:15
[QUOTE=VladSkywolf;315849]Wow, tough question. It's hard to think of only *one* important quality I look for in a partner since it's always been a combination of things.

Hmm... that being said however, I think that a great sense of humour is very important. A person can have many, many great qualities, but if they can't laugh at themselves, at me, the absurdities of life, genuinely funny things, etc, I would have to wonder what spark for life they have, their sense of adventure, and how happy they can really be. Besides, haven't you ever noticed how even less than average looking people can instantly look much more attractice when they smile and laugh - a genuine laugh that's reflected in their eyes? Yeah, if a person can't easily laugh (something I love to do) then for sure it's a turn off.

Other factors I look(ed) for:

- a measure of intelligence
- sincerity
- trust
- empathy
- independence (though not too independent ;))
- pleasing to look at
- chemistry


QUOTE]

At first I was really confused - so many conditions for being your ideal ;) ;)
But then I've remembered that you did find your Ideal woman - so now I am relaxing - it is possible ^-*
People - there is always "half of your heart" - just need to looking for hardly!! :D
Best wishes to you & your family ^-*

dick
12-12-2007, 23:21
He ?? is Sal Gay, lol now thats a turn up for the books LOL

No Clean32 I think she thought YOU were a girl.

Miracle77777
12-12-2007, 23:34
No Clean32 I think she thought YOU were a girl.

Of course NO - next time, please, read my posts more Carefully!!
Regards...

dick
12-12-2007, 23:45
so you think they are both gay?

Sinestro
12-12-2007, 23:55
Hi Miracle,

I wish/want my partner to be able to eat at the dinner table using utensils and able to urinate in the streets when needed, also she must be able to suck a golf ball threw a 15 m garden hose.

It really doesn't matter what her face looks like, as I can easily put a brown paper bag on her head while we are engaged in sex. And if I don't have a brown paper bag, then I'll just turn her around a do her from the behind and shove her face into the pillows.

What else?

VladSkywolf
14-12-2007, 05:48
At first I was really confused - so many conditions for being your ideal ;) ;)


The key word here is 'ideal', something that rarely comes to fruition. :) Yes, I have found my 'ideal' woman but what this really means is that she embodies these attributes to varying degrees. In other words, I wouldn't say 100% for each one, but definitely enough. :)

It's not that I approached potential relationships with a checklist at hand, it's just that after going through various relationships I began to understand more about what worked and what didn't. Too often we ignore the red flags, hoping things will get better, or deluding ourselves with "I can change them" (not!), leading to worse heartache than if one simply recognized early on it wasn't going to work.



But then I've remembered that you did find your Ideal woman - so now I am relaxing - it is possible ^-*


Yes it is possible, as long as we always remember that 'ideal' doesn't mean 'perfect'. We must be ready to accept the 'flaws' with the 'ideal'. :)



People - there is always "half of your heart" - just need to looking for hardly!! :D


Absolutely!



Best wishes to you & your family ^-*

Thanks, you too!

Miracle77777
14-12-2007, 16:42
Too often we ignore the red flags, hoping things will get better, or deluding ourselves with "I can change them" (not!), leading to worse heartache than if one simply recognized early on it wasn't going to work.


Read my thoughts ;)
But want to discuss - "I can change them" - not!
Of course it had happened with me too....when I've seen some signs which annoyed me in my friend, or BF..... And every time when I thought - that's Ok...I will make him change - it didn't worked or worked a little...Very Little.....
But...honestly, I do think...I hope so(!), that Great Love can create Miracles (!!!) ^-*
People stop drinking for saving family... they change their style of life....Maybe it happens very seldom, but it happens...
And the last thing - maybe, sometimes we are the ones who need to change smth for our Love???
Sorry for being too Romantic ;)

VladSkywolf
17-12-2007, 06:57
Read my thoughts ;)
But want to discuss - "I can change them" - not!
Of course it had happened with me too....when I've seen some signs which annoyed me in my friend, or BF..... And every time when I thought - that's Ok...I will make him change - it didn't worked or worked a little...Very Little.....
But...honestly, I do think...I hope so(!), that Great Love can create Miracles (!!!) ^-*
People stop drinking for saving family... they change their style of life....Maybe it happens very seldom, but it happens...
And the last thing - maybe, sometimes we are the ones who need to change smth for our Love???
Sorry for being too Romantic ;)

I can see where a quick statement like I made definitely needs a bit more explanation of what I mean, so I'll give it a try...

When it comes to change, I think the most successful instances of this are when someone truly wants to change themselves - whether out of love for another (good reason :)), or love of self (maybe better?). But if the attempted change comes from someone else and internally it is being resisted, there is little hope for lasting change.

To use your example, someone who stops drinking to save their family does so because they have come to a point where it is what they want to do. The pleas of the parents, spouse, or children alone will not make someone stop drinking. What it can do is (maybe) motivate someone to really think about why they are drinking and hopefully come to the conclusion it is not good for them... but the primary motivation to actually stop has to come from within. Maybe they realize how much they love their family and don't want to see them saddened any longer... maybe out of this love they are motivated to extend their life as much as possible so they can experience their love longer... whatever the reason though, a person must make the decision to change on their own because those that are 'imposed' from without usually carry no lasting weight, i.e., eventually they revert to previous behavior.

And yes, I totally agree with you that change for the sake of a relationship is not a one-way street. We must not only consider that which would make our partner better, but also that which will make us better for our beloved partner. If we were all angels we would be up there looking down. :goldy:

Lastly, I'd like to elaborate a bit about my above comment where I said change for love of self may be better. I truly believe that an emotionally healthy person is one who loves themselves. I don't mean this in a selfish ego-centric way, without regard for anyone or the ability to express true love for someone else, but in a healthy positive way. Love of self brings confidence and happiness, a desire to experience life in all its wonder and walk its roads feeling whole and secure. But best of all, love of self opens you up to really being able to share your self in a loving and emotionally healthy manner with your partner.

To my thinking, how can someone really know what loving someone else is truly all about if they do not know the love of self? Put another way, if I am unable to feel pain, how can I know and understand what someone else's pain feels like? Quite a difficult task I think. :)



But...honestly, I do think...I hope so(!), that Great Love can create Miracles (!!!) ^-*


I do believe (and have seen) that this is true. Great Love can and does inspire Miracles :), but IMHO in a manner in which that love creates a desire within each of us to effect this change. If that love does not inspire us to change... well, then I hold to my original statement.

Oh, and being a romantic is an asset, not a liability. :inlove:

Miracle77777
18-12-2007, 00:32
I can see where a quick statement like I made definitely needs a bit more explanation of what I mean, so I'll give it a try...
When it comes to change, I think the most successful instances of this are when someone truly wants to change themselves - whether out of love for another (good reason :)), or love of self (maybe better?). But if the attempted change comes from someone else and internally it is being resisted, there is little hope for lasting change.
To my thinking, how can someone really know what loving someone else is truly all about if they do not know the love of self? Put another way, if I am unable to feel pain, how can I know and understand what someone else's pain feels like? Quite a difficult task I think. :)
I do believe (and have seen) that this is true. Great Love can and does inspire Miracles :), but IMHO in a manner in which that love creates a desire within each of us to effect this change. If that love does not inspire us to change... well, then I hold to my original statement.
Oh, and being a romantic is an asset, not a liability. :inlove:

Could not express you how I impressed by your opinion.....and way you wrote it...Maybe some day I will be able to such eloquency too :bong:
Of course you right - person could change himself just if that decision will come from inside to him.... with help of his friends, family....

And absolutely agree with "love of self" in a good meaning of this phrase...
Unfortunately it is very hard controlled feeling...and it is so easy to become selfish and egoistic....but if you smart.. and maybe have a right persons around you (starting from you parents and to best friends and spouse) - it is possible to resist to temptation and remain nice, love yourself and love the others.....

And that is very interesting....why on paper (on monitor :) ) that seems so clear and easy for understanding!!
But in life's realities all appear in such a different light!??

Maybe it is too serious for our initial forum...but I have no doubts that you have some of answer...???

VladSkywolf
22-12-2007, 18:39
And that is very interesting....why on paper (on monitor :) ) that seems so clear and easy for understanding!!
But in life's realities all appear in such a different light!??


Ahh... but that's the rub. It is much easier when put to words - putting words into continual action is so much more difficult. Life's realities are challenging enough, but overcoming them while trying to keep to your ideals is even more challenging. Yes, at times I succumb to selfishness, impatience, anger, egotism, etc. just like everyone else - I'm certainly not a saint. :) Afterwards though I'll think about what happened and try to understand why I reacted that way. Was it really about the other person or was it me? What could I do so that I don't react that way in a similar situation again? Too often we are too quick to blame others and not ourselves, and too slow to render an apology thinking we should get one instead.

Normal relationships take constant work in order to succeed, because the moment you stop and begin taking your partner for granted, it is doomed. Maybe not in terms of separation, but certainly in the sense of true joy which should be present in a healthy relationship. This 'work' shouldn't feel like work though, I mean it in the sense of the effort put into making the relationship succeed, and into making it grow even stronger, something which should be joyous. It is in this very same manner in which we should work on our relationship with ourselves, to maintain and grow this 'love of self', and to faciliate positive change within ourselves.

If we don't forget but keep reminding ourselves, then it becomes easier. Our busy lifestyles also contribute to 'nudging' us towards the easier, safer roads, the ones with less effort, less change, because we already have too many things to contend with - why burden ourselves with something else, right? So it really comes down to how badly we want it for ourselves. If we were to approach these kinds of things with the same amount of effort we expended in chasing our first boyfriend/girlfriend, much would be accomplished! :)

Lastly, there's that quiet place deep within us which provides much guidance if we simply listened to it. We stimulate ourselves artificially so often that we cannot hear that inner voice, our intuition. How we 'hear' it differs for each of us, watching a sunset, listening to the ocean surf, meditating, playing/listening our favorite piece of music... whatever it is, do it more often and 'listen'. Life's realities will surely appear in a different light, one which I believe will be in a more positive way. :)

Sorry if any of this sounds incomprehensible, but it's late and I admit I'm a bit tired. :)

Having said that, it's :bedtime:

P.S.
Thank you for the kind words... and yes, I totally agree with you that having the right people around you makes anything possible!