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shurale
28-02-2013, 03:38
This is a letter to a venue owner.
Is it a good letter? A bad letter?

Also, three week for advertisement... is it too short? If I want to have mixed audience, children from the Children's Home and "normal families" children.

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Dear Ms. Calendula,

We have talked about this briefly.You ashowed interest and sked me to tell details in an email.

I and my associates would like to hold a series of volunteering projects in your venue.
These projects will be for children and teenagers from the Children's Home in ___ but we will invite other children and teenagers as well. One of my plans is to help children from the Children's Homes and "normal families" mix and become friends.

As I mentioned in our conversation I know personally the director of the Children's Home and last year I organized an participated in an event in the Children's Home.
He told me that many children who are considered wards of the Children's Home, live externally, i.e. in foster families. These foster parents will bring the children to the events that we will regularly hold.

The purpose of these events shall be not only entertain and educate children, but also promote friendship between children of different nationalities.

So, what these events shall be?

Bilingual Readings (we will read poems and stories, followed by translation), bilingual muppet theater, artistic workshops, chess competitions, intellectual games competitions.

The events will be held for different age groups. From 4 to 16.
The number of children will vary.

Also, I will invite people of different nationalities to come and tell about their countries and/or jobs.
I would like this event for teenagers to take place in three weeks from now. On either 16 or 17th of March. Provided you like this idea and want us to .

And a week later, another event, this time for the age group 4-7. Reading traditional English poems (with translation) followed by workshop.

We could hold the events on either Saturday or Sunday. What would be more convinient for you?

Kind regards,

Shurale

ezik
28-02-2013, 17:14
Nice initiative and three weeks should be enough for advertising it.

Letter could do with some adaptations.

The venue is interested in hosting the event, which means they have a commercial interest in it. This is always the case. This means that they should offer something back. Not just hosting the event, but throw in some beverages, free pizzas etc. The venue will probably aim at a Sunday morning or early afternoon.

Where is the venue? Would they be interested if Expat.ru advertises the event? Also on our Facebook page?

shurale
28-02-2013, 18:37
Nice initiative and three weeks should be enough for advertising it.

Letter could do with some adaptations.

The venue is interested in hosting the event, which means they have a commercial interest in it. This is always the case. This means that they should offer something back. Not just hosting the event, but throw in some beverages, free pizzas etc. The venue will probably aim at a Sunday morning or early afternoon.

Where is the venue? Would they be interested if Expat.ru advertises the event? Also on our Facebook page?

I am in Prague. The event is local.

I wrote the letter to order my thoughts.

I always appreciate help even if it is not financial.
Ideas, proofreading, etc.

celia
01-03-2013, 00:47
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Dear Ms. Calendula,

Further to our recent telephone conversation, I am writing to you about a series of volunteer projects we would like to hold at your venue.

These projects will be for children and teenagers from the Children's Home in ___, although our intention is to invite other children and teenagers as well. (One purpose of our projects is to allow children from the Children's Home to get to know, and become friendly with, other children and families.)

As I mentioned in our conversation, I personally know the director of the Children's Home. Last year I organized and participated in an event at the Home.

At that time the Director told me that many children who are considered wards of the Children's Home live in foster families. We anticipate that these foster parents will bring the children to the events that we will regularly hold.

The purpose of these events is not only to entertain and educate children, but also to promote friendship between children of different nationalities.

Some types of events that we are considering are bilingual readings (we will read poems and stories, followed by translation), bilingual puppet theatre productions, artistic workshops, chess competitions, and competitions involving other intellectual games.

The events will be held for children from 4 to 16. The age and number of children will vary depending on the event.

I also propose to invite people of different nationalities to come and talk about their countries and/or jobs.

If you are agreeable, I would like our first event for teenagers to take place in three weeks from now, on either 16 or 17 March.

I further propose holding another event a week later, this time for the 4-7 age group, where we will read traditional English poems (with translation) followed by a workshop.

We could hold the events on either Saturday or Sunday, whichever is more convenient for you.

I look forward to hearing from you once you have had an opportunity to consider our proposal. If you have any questions or require further information, please do not hesitate to contact me.


Kind regards,

Shurale
__________________
“We must not

celia
01-03-2013, 00:49
Shurale, your letter was fine - don't worry about using the wrong punctuation, what you wrote was completely acceptable. I just went through it once, writing what I would normally write, if that is of any use to you.

Good luck with your venture!

celia
01-03-2013, 00:58
By the way, I thought a "workshop" for 4-7 year olds sounds a bit formal..in fact I'm not sure they'll enjoy traditional poems (I think you mean nursery rhymes) in translation...