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Fantastika
31-10-2007, 23:13
A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into Wal-Mart with
her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the
entrance.

The Wal-Mart Greeter said pleasantly, "Good morning, and welcome to
Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?"

The woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't!
The oldest one's 9 and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think
they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?"

"I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am," replied the greeter. "I just
couldn't believe someone would sleep with you twice. Have a good day
and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart."

I wasn't the greeter

Famous
31-10-2007, 23:19
OK it's a bit naughty but I'll tell it anyway...

Whats' the difference between a penis and a ford cortina?

Famous
31-10-2007, 23:20
You can't fit a ford cortina into a toaster!

TGP
31-10-2007, 23:26
Merry Halloween! :D

Clean32
31-10-2007, 23:30
You can't fit a ford cortina into a toaster!

yes you can !!! LOL

Fantastika
31-10-2007, 23:45
yes you can !!! LOL


I agree.....Happy Halloween!!!!

Clean32
31-10-2007, 23:56
what is Halloween

Fantastika
01-11-2007, 00:34
Not in England, too?

You put on costume, dress as witch, ghost or Britney Spears, knock on every door, say "Trick or Treat." The person will give you candy, to collect in your bag...if they have no candy (treat) then you play "trick" - wipe their windows with soap...

Isn't there something similar in Russia? Last year, they came to my door with bags, I was supposed to give them eggs. But I had no eggs, so i gave them rubles...

Fantastika
01-11-2007, 00:40
You can't fit a ford cortina into a toaster!

And the other one...sounds quite painful...

Clean32
01-11-2007, 01:14
And the other one...sounds quite painful...


depends on what you use LOL

Korotky Gennady
01-11-2007, 01:43
Isn't there something similar in Russia?

My daughter told me that this year they prohibit boys and girls celebrate Halloween. Seems it is connected with the increasing influence of RPC (Russian Orthodox Church ) here...

Fantastika
01-11-2007, 23:12
My daughter told me that this year they prohibit boys and girls celebrate Halloween. Seems it is connected with the increasing influence of RPC (Russian Orthodox Church ) here...

Yes, the original holiday was All-Saint's Day, November 1st. Then somehow, in the US, anyway, the holiday became Oct 31, the day before, when you have a party, before becoming pious on Nov. 1.

The church is focused on November 1st, the true "Holy Day" (holiday), but of course, in the fun-loving US, they focused on the bad side - demons, goblins, monsters, etc. on the evening before, instead of the angels, Saints, good side, etc. on Nov. 1. If I were the church, I, too, would resent so much emphasis on Halloween instead of All-Saints Day...

Similar to New Years Eve, Dec 31, in US - get drunk and party, then on Jan 1, you're supposed to start with a new attitude...

Fantastika
01-11-2007, 23:15
depends on what you use LOL

Maybe my misunderstood word? In Americanese "toaster" is thing you put bread in, to make brown and crisp... it is thing with sharp wires inside... does "toaster" mean something different in English English?

Clean32
01-11-2007, 23:25
Maybe my misunderstood word? In Americanese "toaster" is thing you put bread in, to make brown and crisp... it is thing with sharp wires inside... does "toaster" mean something different in English English?

Maybe just an english toster the wires are not sharp, just red hot