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CatGirl
27-04-2005, 15:11
Feline Reactions to Bearded Men

by Catherine Maloney, Fairfield University, Fairfield, Connecticut, Sarah J. Lichtblau, University of Illinois, Champaign, Illinois Nadya Karpook, University of Florida, Gainesville, Florida Carolyn Chou, University of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Anthony Arena-DeRosa, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts.

Abstract

Cats were exposed to photographs of bearded men. The beards were of various sizes, shapes, and styles. The cats' responses were recorded and analyzed.

Findings of Prior Investigators

Boone (1958) found inconclusive results in studying feline reactions to clean-shaven men. O'Connor and Brynner (1990) found inconclusive results in studying feline reactions to shaven heads. Quant (1965) found inconclusive results in studying feline reactions to bangs. Seuss (1955) found inconclusive results in studying feline reactions to hats. Ciccone (1986) found inconclusive results in studying feline reactions to hairy legs. Other related studies (Smith/Brothers 1972, Conroy 1987, Schwartzenegger 1983) have since been retracted because the investigators were not able to reproduce their results.

Norquist (1988) performed a series of experiments in which cats were exposed to photographs of Robert Bork[1] (not pictured here), a man whose beard is confined largely to the underside of the jaw. After viewing the Bork photograph, 26% of the cats exhibited paralysis of the legs and body, including the neck. An additional 31% of the cats exposed to the Bork photograph showed other types of severe neurological and/or pulmocardial distress and/or exhibited extremely violent behavior. Because of this, we did not include a photograph of this type of bearded man in our study.

Materials

Five photographs were used in the study. The photographs, reproduced here, display a range of different types of bearded men. (As noted above, one type of bearded man was, however, excluded from use in this study.)

The test subjects were female cats, all between the ages of four and six. 214 cats participated in the study. Three cats died during the study, due to causes unrelated to the bearded men. Fifteen cats gave birth while viewing the photographs.[2]

Methods

Each cat was exposed to the photographs. One photograph was shown at a time. Each photograph was visible for a span of twenty seconds. The photographs were presented in the same order to each cat.

While each cat was viewing the photographs, it was held by a laboratory assistant. To ensure that the cats were not influenced by stroking or other unconscious cues from the assistant, the assistant was anesthetized prior to each session. The cats' reactions were assessed for changes in pulse rate, respiration, eye dilation, fur shed rate, and qualitative behavior.

Results(the most funny :) )

The results are presented in Table 1. The quantitative results are average values calculated over the entire feline subject population. The qualitative results are broken out by percentages of the subject population.

Table 1



Pulse Rate:

Runkel: +42%

Crafts: unchanged

Despradelle: +87%

Pritchett: +2%

Wiener: unchanged



Respiration:

Runkel: +186%

Crafts: unchanged

Despradelle: +317%

Pritchett: + 3%

Wiener: unchanged



Eye Dilation:

Runkel: +23%

Crafts: +1%

Despradelle: +31%

Pritchett: +3%

Wiener: unchanged



Fur Shed Rate:

Runkel: +12%

Crafts: unchanged

Despradelle: +19%

Pritchett: +2%

Wiener: unchanged



Qualitative Behavior:

Runkel:

52% attacked photograph; hissing; spitting;

generally agitated behavior.

34% fled.

14% had no visible response.

Crafts:

2% attacked photograph.

1% fled.

1% licked photograph.

94% had no visible response.



Despradelle:

79% attacked photograph; hissing; spitting;

generally violent, agitated behavior; chaotic

tail twitch; screeching; incontinence.

19% fled.

2% had no visible response.

Pritchett:

7% attacked photograph.

1% fled.

91% had no visible response.



Wiener: (100%) No visible response.

Interpretation

Cats do not like men with long beards, especially long dark beards.
Cats are indifferent to men with shorter beards.
Cats are confused and/or disturbed by men with beards that are incomplete (e.g., Bork) and to a lesser degree by men whose beards have missing parts (e.g., Crafts).

These interpretations are not categorical. They are subject to several obvious qualifications. The most notable are listed below.

Qualification A. This study excluded photographs of men with beards confined largely to the underside of the jaw (see above discussion of Robert Bork). While data are available from studies conducted by other investigators, those studies made use of a different methodology than the one we used in our study. We are therefore hesitant to interpret our findings in light of the "Bork" findings, or vice versa.

Qualification B. This study was conducted with photographs of bearded men. In a future study we intend to investigate feline responses to animate bearded men. A large number of factors might produce significantly different results in the two studies. In particular, there has been speculation that bearded men produce pheromones which could have a significant effect on cats.[3]

Acknowledgments

The author wishes to thank The MIT Museum Collection for allowing us to use photographs from its Bearded Men Collection and for generously granting permission to reproduce the photographs as part of this research report. Special thanks to Sally Beddow for assistance in selecting appropriate photographs (the Collection includes more than 71,000 photographs of bearded men) and to Warren Seamans and Kathy Thurston. Special thanks also to Lisa Yane for coordinating the scheduling, travel and housing arrangements for the feline subjects and for obtaining medical clearances in connection with anesthetizing the research assistant.

Notes

1.Bork was a nominee to the United States Supreme Court. Because of Bork's distinctive beard, his photograph has been used in reaction studies with dogs, rats, and planaria (flatworms) and in bombardment studies with pigeons.

2.We excluded all data pertaining to the fifteen cats who gave birth while viewing the photographs. The reproducibility of the GAVE BIRTH/DID NOT GIVE BIRTH data will be addressed in a separate, future study.

3.Photographs do not, of course, produce pheromones, but they do emanate airborne scents derived from chemicals used in the photo developing process. Our study with animate bearded men will employ a strategy to eliminate this imbalance: before being shown to the cats, each bearded man will be immersed in a photochemical bath.

Sidney Bliss
27-04-2005, 15:13
Yeah, great. Thanks for that.

Lled
27-04-2005, 15:14
"Wiener: unchanged"

Cosmogirl, kindly explain why you put such rude stuff in expat cafe...

Thx

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 15:15
Wanna to know about dogs?

You are speedy in reading!!!

I managed to read it in 30 minutes...

Lled
27-04-2005, 15:16
Wanna to know about dogs?

You are speedy in reading!!!

I managed to read it in 30 minutes...


Nooooo, I wanna know about unchanged wieners if it's not too much trouble.

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 15:20
Nooooo, I wanna know about unchanged wieners if it's not too much trouble.

I'm just laughing the half of the day after rereading it and showing to my collegues!! Sorry, I can't explain "why".
:p :hooray: :p :hooray: :p :nut: :nut: :evilgrin:

TinyToes
27-04-2005, 15:21
"...In particular, there has been speculation that bearded men produce pheromones which could have a significant effect on cats..."

Cosmo, I don't really care about how the unshaven men effect on cats.
Better tell us about how the shaven women effect on men...
would be more interesting, I reckon...

Shatneresque
27-04-2005, 15:22
And men generally prefer unshaven ... never mind! :shame:

peyote
27-04-2005, 15:25
Yeah, great. Thanks for that.LOL!

veejay
27-04-2005, 15:29
best f*ckw*t barometer is my cat...cat doesn't like the bloke...he's bad news...

Lled
27-04-2005, 15:35
best f*ckw*t barometer is my cat...cat doesn't like the bloke...he's bad news...

You got a REAL moody cat then right?

:)

Lled
27-04-2005, 15:35
"...In particular, there has been speculation that bearded men produce pheromones which could have a significant effect on cats..."

Cosmo, I don't really care about how the unshaven men effect on cats.
Better tell us about how the shaven women effect on men...
would be more interesting, I reckon...

I'm doing a personal study on that issue myself at the moment, funny you should mention it....

veejay
27-04-2005, 15:38
You got a REAL moody cat then right?

:)
my cat is lovely...and incredibly astute at picking up on mean people suck vibes...

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 15:45
Social psychology of beards

The following was extracted from The Social Psychology of Facial Appearance (1988) by Ray Bull and Nichola Rumsey.
Little social psychological research has been conducted on this topic, and what there is seems rather basic. In 1969 Freedman reported that female students rated a bearded male face as more masculine, mature, independent, and sophisticated than a nonbearded face. Similarly, both Roll and Verinis (1971) and Kenny and Fletcher (1973) found students to rate a bearded face as more masculine, strong, and sincere, but also more dirty (versus clean). Pancer and Meindl (1978) found beardedness to lead to more positive ratings. However, Feinman and Gill (1977) found their female students to like least a man with a beard. They put this finding down to the possibility that their Wyoming students were more conservative than the Chicago, Midwestern, Memphis, and Canadian students of the above four studies.

Sidney Bliss
27-04-2005, 15:47
Anyone got any paperclips that need straightening?

Lled
27-04-2005, 15:49
Anyone got any paperclips that need straightening?

I'm into bath salts myself

Shatneresque
27-04-2005, 15:49
Better tell us about how the shaven women effect on men....
Are we talking facial hair here, or what...? :rolleyes:

Lled
27-04-2005, 15:50
Are we talking facial hair here, or what...? :rolleyes:

Pweeeeeuuuuuweeeeeee

TinyToes
27-04-2005, 15:51
Are we talking facial hair here, or what...? :rolleyes:


or what

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 15:51
Are we talking facial hair here, or what...? :rolleyes:

Are we actually talking???

;)

Shatneresque
27-04-2005, 15:53
Are we actually talking???
Enough talk! Let's JUST DO IT!!! :evil:

joners66
27-04-2005, 15:54
Got any on cats watching paint dry??????

'Cosmo, I don't really care about how the unshaven men effect on cats.
Better tell us about how the shaven women effect on men...
would be more interesting, I reckon...'

Now that is an interesting subject that deserves further discussion.......................

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 15:55
Enough talk! Let's JUST DO IT!!! :evil:
If expat has a smiley with hysterical laughter - I would have posted all the page with it. :D :D :D :D :D

Lled
27-04-2005, 15:56
or what

Isn't that how you addressed the Pope?

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 15:56
Got any on cats watching paint dry??????

'Cosmo, I don't really care about how the unshaven men effect on cats.
Better tell us about how the shaven women effect on men...
would be more interesting, I reckon...'

Now that is an interesting subject that deserves further discussion.......................


Now give a rep score to TT :) :) :)

Lady Marmalade
27-04-2005, 15:59
Joners66, I think somewhere on this site they have already polled that particular discussion. I think the winner was the neatly clipped landing strip if you know what I mean.

TinyToes
27-04-2005, 16:00
Isn't that how you addressed the Pope?


no, it was: "Dear Pope", but thanks for reminding.
still no answer.
have to resend again...
old big-hat-lover...

joners66
27-04-2005, 16:03
'Joners66, I think somewhere on this site they have already polled that particular discussion. I think the winner was the neatly clipped landing strip if you know what I mean.'

Shame I missed it......The landing strip wouldnt have got my vote......

Shatneresque
27-04-2005, 16:03
no, it was: "Dear Pope", but thanks for reminding.
still no answer.
have to resend again...
old big-hat-lover...
That's not his hat in his lap ... he's just happy to see you! :D

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 16:08
Does any Pope has a beard?!!

Shatneresque
27-04-2005, 16:10
Does any Pope has a beard?!!
Reminds me of a really dirty joke I learned in junior high.... :evilgrin:

TinyToes
27-04-2005, 16:10
Shame I missed it......The landing strip wouldnt have got my vote......

Joners, you're disappointing me... I thought you'd go for the completely shaven one...

Lled
27-04-2005, 16:10
Does any Pope has a beard?!!

Well, out of the numerous Popes currently presiding over the catholic cult (sorry), nope, none.

They're all slapheads too.

Lled
27-04-2005, 16:11
Joners, you're disappointing me... I thought you'd go for the completely shaven one...

I think it's what he meant

joners66
27-04-2005, 16:12
'Joners, you're disappointing me... I thought you'd go for the completely shaven one...'

I would, but I'd have to do the shaving, and dont worry I have a very steady hand.......

TinyToes
27-04-2005, 16:16
I have a very steady hand.......

are you sure it's the hand?

Shatneresque
27-04-2005, 16:19
the winner was the neatly clipped landing strip
Strip, schmip! Give me a nice full bush any day!

Ghost
27-04-2005, 16:21
Cats and Bearded Men.

joners66
27-04-2005, 17:16
are you sure it's the hand?

Either or, Im steady with both................

TinyToes
27-04-2005, 17:28
Either or, Im steady with both................


you're almost the Man of my Dream then.

...almost...

joners66
27-04-2005, 17:34
'...almost...'

There is always a catch..........................

Lled
27-04-2005, 17:36
'...almost...'

There is always a catch..........................

There's always something isn't there?

Too big, too small, ugly, headache, just did it, skunk breath

"almost" is a new one

joners66
27-04-2005, 17:49
There's always something isn't there?

Too big, too small, ugly, headache, just did it, skunk breath

"almost" is a new one

And the "almost" will be the one that that you cant, or wont change. I would almost do it but you are a spurs fan.......

Lled
27-04-2005, 18:03
And the "almost" will be the one that that you cant, or wont change. I would almost do it but you are a spurs fan.......

In this case I think she does it BECAUSE I am a Spurs fan...

TinyToes
27-04-2005, 18:09
And the "almost" will be the one that that you cant, or wont change. I would almost do it but you are a spurs fan.......


I almost got excited already... but you hit me right into my heart with Spurs...

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 18:12
Cats and Bearded Men.

Tell me about that french who posted that nonsense?

:D :D :D

Lled
27-04-2005, 18:18
I almost got excited already... but you hit me right into my heart with Spurs...

:inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove:

CatGirl
27-04-2005, 19:05
:inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :inlove:

Arsenal has a french coach but Tottenham loses..!! :hooray: :hooray:

Shame on them..! :rolleyes:

ezik
04-09-2007, 22:21
Lesson learnt: get a dog instead of a cat and give it food. It will love you no matter what.