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tvadim133
22-02-2010, 23:26
Today (not for the first time) we have had a debate with my friends after some vodka and beer about the sence of life (that is probably traditinal topic after 3 bottle of vodka and 5 litres of beer per 8 (amoung russians),

There is a stereotype experession in Russia, that the sence of life consists of tree main objectives (Goals):

1. to build a house;
2. to give a child birth;
3. to plant a tree

These goals can be in a different orders (no ABC at least)

But there were 6 guys (and 2 girls) around the table, and we heard 7 different variants of sences of life (to born a child was very common (within 4 variants at least).

So, what is yours?

Voodoo
22-02-2010, 23:43
Perhaps to be happy?

I know it sounds very banal but think about it. If you are a 'normal' person you're happy if you're achieving your goals - which by definition means having kids, having a good job, being healthy, leaving some legacy for future generations, having enough money to enjoy some of the good things in life.

Having each of things in isolation doesn't really mean much. I can wish for a ton of money, but that won't necessarily make me happy or healthy. I can have kids, but they can turn out to be delinquent little sh!ts. I think the easiest way to define it is through happiness. If you're happy, you're content. If you're content then, at least by your own internal definition, you're achieving meaning in your life.

Matt24
22-02-2010, 23:45
Today (not for the first time) we have had a debate with my friends after some vodka and beer about the sence of life (that is probably traditinal topic after 3 bottle of vodka and 5 litres of beer per 8 (amoung russians),

There is a stereotype experession in Russia, that the sence of life consists of tree main objectives (Goals):

1. to build a house;
2. to give a child birth;
3. to plant a tree

These goals can be in a different orders (no ABC at least)

But there were 6 guys (and 2 girls) around the table, and we heard 7 different variants of sences of life (to born a child was very common (within 4 variants at least).

So, what is yours?

Small world, today we, (3 women, 4 men - 2 Jews, a catholic, a presbyterian and 2 Orthodox), were trying to come up with a mission statement for my new company which soon became a session of drunken philosophizing - my life goals were:

To try and cause no harm, and if harm be needed to have a reason that means you can always sleep at night;

To raise a child/children in such a way as to give them every opportunity to enjoy their lives to the full;

To ensure and improve the quality of life of our parents, and to bury them; and

In however microscopically small a manner, leave this world a better place.

A bit depressing, but as it was a working lunch we stuck to Gin and Red wine.


Cheers

Matt

ezik
23-02-2010, 00:05
Nice post.
I've been listening to the album "There's a Riot Going On" by Sly and the Family stone recently.
Your post just embodies the lyrics of Bobby Womack in the song called "It's a Family Affair" of that same, notorious, album.


Perhaps to be happy?

I know it sounds very banal but think about it. If you are a 'normal' person you're happy if you're achieving your goals - which by definition means having kids, having a good job, being healthy, leaving some legacy for future generations, having enough money to enjoy some of the good things in life.

Having each of things in isolation doesn't really mean much. I can wish for a ton of money, but that won't necessarily make me happy or healthy. I can have kids, but they can turn out to be delinquent little sh!ts. I think the easiest way to define it is through happiness. If you're happy, you're content. If you're content then, at least by your own internal definition, you're achieving meaning in your life.

tvadim133
23-02-2010, 00:10
The only thing, how to learn to be happy? It is possible at all? Isn't it strange, to be happy all the time (to be positive at least, all the time)?

OlgaT
23-02-2010, 00:19
One famous Russian philosopher said that the sense of life is in looking for a sense of life. I agree with him since I don't know what being happy means. :rasta:

OlgaT
23-02-2010, 00:24
The only thing, how to learn to be happy? It is possible at all? Isn't it strange, to be happy all the time (to be positive at least, all the time)?
Exactly! They say that as soon as you achieve happiness, you are losing it, since you have no more goals...

ezik
23-02-2010, 00:25
The only thing, how to learn to be happy? It is possible at all? Isn't it strange, to be happy all the time (to be positive at least, all the time)?

To be happy 100% of the time is very ambitious and not realistic.

I wouldn't feel happy at my best moments if it wasn't for some unhappy stuff I had to go through. Thesis & anti-Thesis.

ezik
23-02-2010, 00:27
Exactly! They say that as soon as you achieve happiness, you are losing it, since you have no more goals...
Nice one!

mikegulf
23-02-2010, 19:52
I suppose a sense of purpose. To look back in old age and feel confident that I have left my small part of the world and those in it better off then when I started.

Mirka
23-02-2010, 20:29
To make this world a better place, to listen to people, to be nice to people and try to add value to their life (speaking of course mostly of acointances and friends cos you cannot possibly add value to everyone). And yes be happy. Maybe not 100% of the time (cos it is not possible) but be happy, smile, and make people smile and feel happy.
Goals as home, child, tree....well everybody has its goals and dreams and I guess everybody has a different one.

Mirka
23-02-2010, 20:34
Exactly! They say that as soon as you achieve happiness, you are losing it, since you have no more goals...

I disagree (sorry Olga) cos I don't think happiness is only define by achieving goals. I think happiness is the feeling you have when you hear a good song, or when somebody on the street smile on you, or when there is a person at the airport who will help you with the suitcase, or when your flatmate will make you a nice dinner just because she/he knows you had a hard day at work and want to surprise you. These things are not about goals and yet they are about happiness which also creates a sense of life in a way. By my opinion at least.

tvadim133
24-02-2010, 22:30
Happiness is really something connected with feeling (it is feeling) which can not be for as long period of time.

Can we say that the sence of life is to live a happy life?

Or something else?

OlgaT
24-02-2010, 23:37
I disagree (sorry Olga) cos I don't think happiness is only define by achieving goals. I think happiness is the feeling you have when you hear a good song, or when somebody on the street smile on you, or when there is a person at the airport who will help you with the suitcase, or when your flatmate will make you a nice dinner just because she/he knows you had a hard day at work and want to surprise you. These things are not about goals and yet they are about happiness which also creates a sense of life in a way. By my opinion at least.Do not be sorry Mirka since you are right. ;)
What I meant and mean is that happiness as a fullness - the circle is closed. You can tell that it's when your friend meets you in the airport, you have a glass of wiskey on the way home and so on. But they are only fragments of happiness. I remember the day when I was flying home from Crimea last summer - somewhere in the sky (I adore flying), some wine, listening to Pink Floyd and looking at the window, I thought nothing could be better and I wanted to stop that moment. But it was not about happiness, they were just moments of life. Very pleasant moments but still... it is not happiness. Surrogates... may be. Because you can't close the circle with them, you need something more. Ok, maybe it's only me who can't be satisfied with the moments, but wants an eternity... Never mind. I am drunk today and it's also a thing that can make me happy... for several hours at least.

robertmf
25-02-2010, 05:16
... Never mind. I am drunk today and it's also a thing that can make me happy... for several hours at least.

I'm certain you know that alcohol is a depressant ?-:( Have you ever tried no alcohol + prozac ?

OlgaT
25-02-2010, 10:11
I'm certain you know that alcohol is a depressant ?-:( Have you ever tried no alcohol + prozac ?


No, never prozac, I haven't had depressions by now.

And regarding depressants - it depends... When some wine in a good company - it's a pleasure, not depression. But next morning, yes, I agree, could be. Especially when you find out that Russia lost and see that shameful score... :groan:

Or maybe I should start supporting Canadians? Looks like they are more reliable. :rofl:

len
25-02-2010, 10:21
So, what is yours?

i am yet to achieve mine

shurale
25-02-2010, 12:10
I think it is supposed to be called "meaning of life".
Anyway, what is that joke
-"What is a meaning of life?"
-I will reply your question if you tell me what is meaning and what is life.

Willy
25-02-2010, 12:24
Today (not for the first time) we have had a debate with my friends after some vodka and beer about the sence of life (that is probably traditinal topic after 3 bottle of vodka and 5 litres of beer per 8 (amoung russians),

There is a stereotype experession in Russia, that the sence of life consists of tree main objectives (Goals):

1. to build a house;
2. to give a child birth;
3. to plant a tree

These goals can be in a different orders (no ABC at least)

But there were 6 guys (and 2 girls) around the table, and we heard 7 different variants of sences of life (to born a child was very common (within 4 variants at least).

So, what is yours?



We're all actors and this is a big play, some like drama, some like comedy, some like cops and robbers some like suspense, Some like mystery a cliffhanger, sitting on a fence. Some time it's mindboggling an enigma at best, mostly it's a stumper a brainteaser or vexed just sit back and enjoy it because some time it don't make sense.

Darya Alexandrovna
25-02-2010, 13:12
Many people consider this desired ' happiness' as something very special, but frankly speaking it is the feeling that everything is very good, your bottom is in a warm place, you need not bother about anything, need not work (work in a wide sense)... But as we all reaslize the moment can't be brought to a halt. And this happiness becomes just a moment in a lifetime. We all will die sooner or later. What if I die tomorrow? Then Today with it's positive and negative monents, all faces of people passing by and a smile of a dear to the heart is filled with sence. It becomes happiness to be able to breath! May be we should always remember about death to be really alive?
The sence can not be seen from a close distance. To understand the sence one needs to go beyond the border of situation. In case of life- to understand the sence of one's life one should cross the life's border. It is smth very difficult for a common person to do.
But to live your life taking good and bad equally, to live in harmony with your conscience , to be honest, to work on your personality, to live with your eyes wide open and do what life is making you do to learn those lessons you are supposed to learn - this is what in the end will build up in a picture of your - very individual- life;life full of sense!
I remember a very bright metaphor from Maugham's "Of Human Bondage" when Cronshaw compares a life of a person with an arabic carpet. And each end every pattern on that individual carpet of your life is made by you.
Everything depends on you yourself and nothing depends on you..........
'Good' and 'bad' are very relative terms indeed!
So what's the sence in life? - Life itself I think. Life in general and life of an individual. Life as you know it.

Willy
25-02-2010, 13:31
Many people consider this desired ' happiness' as something very special, but frankly speaking it is the feeling that everything is very good, your bottom is in a warm place, you need not bother about anything, need not work (work in a wide sense)... But as we all reaslize the moment can't be brought to a halt. And this happiness becomes just a moment in a lifetime. We all will die sooner or later. What if I die tomorrow? Then Today with it's positive and negative monents, all faces of people passing by and a smile of a dear to the heart is filled with sence. It becomes happiness to be able to breath! May be we should always remember about death to be really alive?
The sence can not be seen from a close distance. To understand the sence one needs to go beyond the border of situation. In case of life- to understand the sence of one's life one should cross the life's border. It is smth very difficult for a common person to do.
But to live your life taking good and bad equally, to live in harmony with your conscience , to be honest, to work on your personality, to live with your eyes wide open and do what life is making you do to learn those lessons you are supposed to learn - this is what in the end will build up in a picture of your - very individual- life;life full of sense!
I remember a very bright metaphor from Maugham's "Of Human Bondage" when Cronshaw compares a life of a person with an arabic carpet. And each end every pattern on that individual carpet of your life is made by you.
Everything depends on you yourself and nothing depends on you..........
'Good' and 'bad' are very relative terms indeed!
So what's the sence in life? - Life itself I think. Life in general and life of an individual. Life as you know it.



Sounds pretty good to me.

There is no bad in this world, it's all good. It's what you make of it.

Matt24
25-02-2010, 17:41
Sounds pretty good to me.

There is no bad in this world, it's all good. It's what you make of it.


I think there's a great deal of sense in what you and Darya before you wrote, I wholeheartedly agree that the world is what you make of it, but I do reject the position that there is no bad, ever mindful of what Edmund Burke said/wrote, ‘The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.’ I feel good about sticking my nose in when something looks/smells/sounds wrong, after fine food, copious amounts of alcohol and the love of my family and friends making a difference massively adds to my quality of life

Matt

Viola
25-02-2010, 17:45
It's interesting how most people equate meaning of life to being happy. Though many religions include suffering as part of life process and spiritual growth.

shurale
25-02-2010, 19:33
It's interesting how most people equate meaning of life to being happy. Though many religions include suffering as part of life process and spiritual growth.

Yes. And suffering of others, too. Especially that of others.

tvadim133
25-02-2010, 22:58
It comes to my mind, that may be the most important meaning of a life is to live it honestly, without becoming riff raff, to learn bad experience.

You know, we all have got different mistakes, do smth wrong and so on.

But may be, the goal of our lives is to learn to be a true humain being.

It seems to me, that all thing (experience) happened with us are because of some lessons we are to pass in our lives.

Sometimes they are too hurting for us, sometimes we just do not pay attention to them, but then they repeat in another format.

I think about it without any religious preconditions, but....

What do you think?

Or it is too serious and each person should decide it for himself (herself)?

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 00:17
I think there are two types of people in general: those who understand the responsibility and realize that each and every step/word/breath/thought etc. affects life (affects the universe because all things in the world are connected) and those who don't seriously realize that (but of course everyone says we 'understand everything'. but there is a big difference between understanding and realizing); and those who do not realize it, they live life automatically and search for that happyness, suffer, do things, but even if they cheat and lie or commit a crime they go away with that - they don't have that inner conscience responsibility. And as you, Vadim, say one situation can be happening to a person thousands of time even till he/she gets really old - but the lesson would not be learnt...
And for those who feels that responsibily the life is harder, all bets are higher. You lie one time but you pay a double tariff on that lie. And each situation is a lesson to learn: how to treat people around you, how to press your ego, many-many things...and how to love indeed! Because honeslty! - many of us do not really know how to love. Our ego rules our minds, we want to be on a safe side. But world is so huge and flamboyant and different, we can not make things happen for our own pleasure. But when loving and taking it/he/she/thigs/situations etc, as it/etc. is, sharing love, giving love we become better, lessons are easily learnt. Nobody says life is easy. And what we can do is behave ourselves. And try to learn to love. And never stop!

Mike3
26-02-2010, 00:22
I think that life was made on contrast -it is very important.
happiness and unhappiness link to each others.
For example- don't drink 2 days and one glass of water after makes happiness.

Viola
26-02-2010, 11:23
I like the idea of mindfulness. Living the life as a dot, consciously savour every moment of life, live in present, not in the past or in the future. Living each moment fully as it happens.

I don't buy the idea of "learning" or life goal, so that when you arrive to the end stop you have learned all lessons. But who needs them then?
Maybe this illustration may help to get the idea,

http://souljerky.com/_media/swf/alan_watts_life.swf

Ghostly Presence
26-02-2010, 14:05
Because honeslty! - many of us do not really know how to love. Our ego rules our minds, we want to be on a safe side. But world is so huge and flamboyant and different, we can not make things happen for our own pleasure. But when loving and taking it/he/she/thigs/situations etc, as it/etc. is, sharing love, giving love we become better, lessons are easily learnt. Nobody says life is easy. And what we can do is behave ourselves. And try to learn to love. And never stop!

A lot of those folks who had what is known as near-death experience return from the brink of death with a clear conviction that the most important thing in this life is Love. The bonds of love we form are forever, they survive death. Love is what this life all about, they claim. If this life is indeed just a school for something beyond our earthly existence, than love must be the hardest lesson to learn as it requires that we overcome our selfishness which is an arduous task indeed.

www.nderf.org

Viola
26-02-2010, 14:31
If this life is indeed just a school for something beyond our earthly existence, than love must be the hardest lesson to learn as it requires that we overcome our selfishness which is an arduous task indeed.


When you really love someone it is the easiest thing, it comes naturally. It's just there.

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 14:48
When you really love someone it is the easiest thing, it comes naturally. It's just there.

Love is something wide open. It happens not only between men and women. If you have that love inside, even paying the bill in shop can be done with love. It is a question of not being selfish. ah, so difficult to find right words to express what I feel about that.
Situation: you are walking along the street... And you're not thinking about yourself, what you must do or what conversation you had yesterday with your boss/bf/gf....you realise each step you make, you look in the eyes of people who are passing you by and what you feel about those people is love...and even if you don't smile, a person who sees you feels as if you have just smiled. And you feel warm and full.
Or you see that somebody needs help. And you help. And you don't need "thanks" as a reply, you don't want to be considered to be a kind person. You ARE kind. You are LOVING.
And yes, here I agree- it is easy when you have this loving 'capacity'.
But to become like that you need to culivate your abilities. Analysing situations, analysing moments when you feel offended for example ask yourself "why am I offended?" and find the true answer that usually is "because smb has offended my ego, made me look less importaint then I think I am". If you are loving, you enjoy giving, and you don't bother about taking. It is so difficult, it is really smth you need to learn to do. And it's grand if you realize it!

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 14:52
But still we all are playing games. There are not so many people who really want to find the Truth. And I think I know why. Because when you know smth, you need to apply your knowledge some way. And who really wants it? We think we want smth, but when we get it we find out that it was not really what we wanted, or that we don't want it anymore. Agree?

Viola
26-02-2010, 14:59
Love is something wide open. It happens not only between men and women. If you have that love inside, even paying the bill in shop can be done with love. It is a question of not being selfish. ah, so difficult to find right words to express what I feel about that.
Situation: you are walking along the street... And you're not thinking about yourself, what you must do or what conversation you had yesterday with your boss/bf/gf....you realise each step you make, you look in the eyes of people who are passing you by and what you feel about those people is love...and even if you don't smile, a person who sees you feels as if you have just smiled. And you feel warm and full.
Or you see that somebody needs help. And you help. And you don't need "thanks" as a reply, you don't want to be considered to be a kind person. You ARE kind. You are LOVING.
And yes, here I agree- it is easy when you have this loving 'capacity'.
But to become like that you need to culivate your abilities. Analysing situations, analysing moments when you feel offended for example ask yourself "why am I offended?" and find the true answer that usually is "because smb has offended my ego, made me look less importaint then I think I am". If you are loving, you enjoy giving, and you don't bother about taking. It is so difficult, it is really smth you need to learn to do. And it's grand if you realize it!

Darya, it is called "mindfulness", living each moment fully and consiously as it happens.
Google for it.

Ghostly Presence
26-02-2010, 15:00
But still we all are playing games. There are not so many people who really want to find the Truth. And I think I know why. Because when you know smth, you need to apply your knowledge some way. And who really wants it? We think we want smth, but when we get it we find out that it was not really what we wanted, or that we don't want it anymore. Agree?

There is some truth to that. As one philosopher has put it, the ultimate goal is nothing; the journey towards that goal is everything.

Viola
26-02-2010, 15:02
But still we all are playing games. There are not so many people who really want to find the Truth. And I think I know why. Because when you know smth, you need to apply your knowledge some way. And who really wants it? We think we want smth, but when we get it we find out that it was not really what we wanted, or that we don't want it anymore. Agree?

No. I realised long ago that the most difficult thing is not to achieve smth but find out what you really want and need. As soon as you know this things come to you easily, life send them to you without any additional efforts from your side.

And on the other hand, when life sent you smth don't fight against it but access what is the meaning of that, why did it happen, nothing is accidantal and has its meaning in your life, either it is a lesson or a sign that you need to change the direction of your efforts, re-assess your goals, values etc.

Ghostly Presence
26-02-2010, 15:12
No. I realised long ago that the most difficult thing is not to achieve smth but find out what you really want and need. As soon as you know this things come to you easily, life send them to you without any additional efforts from your side.

You might be certain about what you want and need, but has it ever happened to you that you end up being dissapointed having received what you wanted?

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 15:18
Darya, it is called "mindfulness", living each moment fully and consiously as it happens.
Google for it.

Is it a loving message? thank you, Viola ))), I'll learn "mindfulness"

Viola
26-02-2010, 15:25
Is it a loving message? thank you, Viola ))), I'll learn "mindfulness"

Darya, I gave you a direction.
Loving doesn't mean being everything for everybody. In my first post I mentioned mindfulness, no one react on it. Does it mean that people are unaware about it? Does it mean I should explain the whole theory from scratch? For me, no. If someone at the stage of their lives when they are ready to this approach and willing to learn, they will find out more about it.

You may also have a look at books of Jon Kabat-Zinn.

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 15:26
Life it too complex to fit it into a number of standars schems and recipes.
We are so different, that same situation can not work in a same way with everyone. One can say only for himself, I suppose.

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 15:39
Darya, I gave you a direction.
Loving doesn't mean being everything for everybody. In my first post I mentioned mindfulness, no one react on it. Does it mean that people are unaware about it? Does it mean I should explain the whole theory from scratch? For me, no. If someone at the stage of their lives when they are ready to this approach and willing to learn, they will find out more about it.

You may also have a look at books of Jon Kabat-Zinn.

:confused1:
I do not ask for explanation. ))) I just take your post as a public emphasis that you are smarter then I am. Well, you are! Next time I would use the right word, thanks to you. (And I am not pulling your leg, honestly. Don't take me wrong)
Btw, there is also a problem of understanding one and the same word by different people. Difference in denotation sometimes bring to a hUUUUge misunderstanding, don't you think so?

Thanks for the link Viola, I'll check it. :bookworm:

Viola
26-02-2010, 15:46
Is it a loving message? thank you, Viola ))), I'll learn "mindfulness"

Wasn't it irony? If not then it was misunderstanding from my side.

Viola
26-02-2010, 15:48
:confused1:
I do not ask for explanation. ))) I just take your post as a public emphasis that you are smarter then I am. Well, you are! Next time I would use the right word, thanks to you. (And I am not pulling your leg, honestly. Don't take me wrong)
Btw, there is also a problem of understanding one and the same word by different people. Difference in denotation sometimes bring to a hUUUUge misunderstanding, don't you think so?

Thanks for the link Viola, I'll check it. :bookworm:


I meant explanation not only to you, it was not personal, just speculations in general.

Actually you are the only one who asked :)

And of course you are right about wording, it is easy to be misunderstood when conversing at the forum.

Editing the same post for the 4th time is not so smart :lol:, just want to add that emphasising my smartness is not important for me. There are other essential things in life.

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 15:54
No irony. Just a question so that you can think over your previous statement. It looked a bit rude to me. As far as we are discussing things like life and love here...
And if it had been irony, why would it affect you so much?
I mean with all this that practice of love and self-improvement is everywhere! Even at the forum.
Sincerily, my best wishes to you!

Darya Alexandrovna
26-02-2010, 16:01
And of course you are right about wording, it is easy to be misunderstood when conversing at the forum.

Editing the same post for the 4th time is not so smart :lol:, just want to add that emphasising my smartness is not important for me. There are other essential things in life.

Amen, Sister!:11629:

And not only at the forum. ;)

Viola
26-02-2010, 16:10
No irony. Just a question so that you can think over your previous statement. It looked a bit rude to me.

Didn't want to be rude, just been wrinting in ahurry, have things to do at work. Couldn't wright long posts.


As far as we are discussing things like life and love here...
And if it had been irony, why would it affect you so much?
I mean with all this that practice of love and self-improvement is everywhere! Even at the forum.
Sincerily, my best wishes to you!

Because I didn't mean to sound rude or arrogant.

Let's stop here.

Viola
27-02-2010, 10:40
I came across this beautiful poem by Jacques Prevert , decided to post it in this thread. I like Russian translation better but since we are in the English forum I post both.

Какое сегодня у нас число?
Число? Любое... и день любой,
Моя дорогая.
Все дни такие у нас с тобой,
Вся жизнь такая.
Мы любим и воздухом дышим,
Живём и любим друг друга,
Не зная, что значит жизнь,
Не зная, что значит день,
Что значит любовь, не зная.

Song
What day are we?
We are every day
My friend
We're the whole of life
My love
We love and we live
We live and we love
And we don't really know
What life is
And we don't really know
What the day is
And we don't really know
What love is


Spring is on the threshold :)

Viola
27-02-2010, 11:15
.

nbogaard
27-02-2010, 11:30
You may also have a look at books of Jon Kabat-Zinn.

Viola, Can you nrecommend a starting book for his works? Thank you.

Willy
27-02-2010, 12:47
Love is something wide open. It happens not only between men and women. If you have that love inside, even paying the bill in shop can be done with love. It is a question of not being selfish. ah, so difficult to find right words to express what I feel about that.
Situation: you are walking along the street... And you're not thinking about yourself, what you must do or what conversation you had yesterday with your boss/bf/gf....you realise each step you make, you look in the eyes of people who are passing you by and what you feel about those people is love...and even if you don't smile, a person who sees you feels as if you have just smiled. And you feel warm and full.
Or you see that somebody needs help. And you help. And you don't need "thanks" as a reply, you don't want to be considered to be a kind person. You ARE kind. You are LOVING.
And yes, here I agree- it is easy when you have this loving 'capacity'.
But to become like that you need to culivate your abilities. Analysing situations, analysing moments when you feel offended for example ask yourself "why am I offended?" and find the true answer that usually is "because smb has offended my ego, made me look less importaint then I think I am". If you are loving, you enjoy giving, and you don't bother about taking. It is so difficult, it is really smth you need to learn to do. And it's grand if you realize it!



If you think good thoughts people will think good of you.

Show love and love comes back.

We are all equal, you, me, them, dogs, cats, ants, trees, mold, bacterium, every living thing. Nothing and nobody is better than anyone/thing else.

When you stop to want, need, have, you will find you won't have to defend yourself and you can be free. If you have nothing to defend you will see what life and love is all about.

Viola
27-02-2010, 13:03
Well said, Willy!

Viola
27-02-2010, 13:15
Viola, Can you nrecommend a starting book for his works? Thank you.

I think his first book is "Wherever you go, there you are".

Nbogaard, I just want to note that I don't follow any particular school or technic (including this one), just employ bits from here and there that fit my views and lifestyle, I am very practical and down to earth but I find it easier to accept life on its own terms.

nbogaard
27-02-2010, 15:09
I think his first book is "Wherever you go, there you are".

Nbogaard, I just want to note that I don't follow any particular school or technic (including this one), just employ bits from here and there that fit my views and lifestyle, I am very practical and down to earth but I find it easier to accept life on its own terms.

I do the same but I am always interested in sampling the things others find to be helpful toward self fulfillment. Sometimes those things are terrific and sometimes they are not for me but they are worth trying all the same. Thanks for the recommendation!

Natella S.
02-03-2010, 12:55
Perhaps to be happy?

I know it sounds very banal but think about it. If you are a 'normal' person you're happy if you're achieving your goals - which by definition means having kids, having a good job, being healthy, leaving some legacy for future generations, having enough money to enjoy some of the good things in life.

Having each of things in isolation doesn't really mean much. I can wish for a ton of money, but that won't necessarily make me happy or healthy. I can have kids, but they can turn out to be delinquent little sh!ts. I think the easiest way to define it is through happiness. If you're happy, you're content. If you're content then, at least by your own internal definition, you're achieving meaning in your life.

I totally agree with you. I have a question. Is it normal if a man who is over 40 y.o., doesn't want to have children?

Natella

MissAnnElk
02-03-2010, 13:07
Is it normal if a man who is over 40 y.o., doesn't want to have children?

What is "normal"? I had no interest in having children until I was 38.

Everyone is different. People who do not want children should not have children.

Natella S.
02-03-2010, 13:55
It comes to my mind, that may be the most important meaning of a life is to live it honestly, without becoming riff raff, to learn bad experience.

You know, we all have got different mistakes, do smth wrong and so on.

But may be, the goal of our lives is to learn to be a true humain being.

It seems to me, that all thing (experience) happened with us are because of some lessons we are to pass in our lives.

Sometimes they are too hurting for us, sometimes we just do not pay attention to them, but then they repeat in another format.

I think about it without any religious preconditions, but....

What do you think?

Or it is too serious and each person should decide it for himself (herself)?


I totally agree with you.
You may also have noticed that from time to time we receive signs of life. They are things, people or event which sort of tell us the right decision. Signs help me a lot. I started noticing them around 2-3 years ago. Then, I read about them in Alkhimic of Paolo Coello. Паоло Коэльо. Do you like the books of this brazilian writer?

Natella S.
02-03-2010, 16:04
If you think good thoughts people will think good of you.

Show love and love comes back.

We are all equal, you, me, them, dogs, cats, ants, trees, mold, bacterium, every living thing. Nothing and nobody is better than anyone/thing else.

When you stop to want, need, have, you will find you won't have to defend yourself and you can be free. If you have nothing to defend you will see what life and love is all about.

Bravissimo! Браво!

tvadim133
02-03-2010, 16:46
I totally agree with you. I have a question. Is it normal if a man who is over 40 y.o., doesn't want to have children?

Natella

Though I am still younger then 40 y.o., but I do not like ot have got children.

Not because I am selfish, egoist, do not like to be responsible or something else.

If it happens, it happens, but it is not for me for 100% (may 50%), to my mind.

I can understand those who want, but I do understand those, who do not.

Though My friends tell me (see me) to be a very "mad" father in future, having noticed how I treated my pets.

tvadim133
02-03-2010, 16:49
I totally agree with you.
You may also have noticed that from time to time we receive signs of life. They are things, people or event which sort of tell us the right decision. Signs help me a lot. I started noticing them around 2-3 years ago. Then, I read about them in Alkhimic of Paolo Coello. Паоло Коэльо. Do you like the books of this brazilian writer?

As for me, I like. Frankly speaking there a r e alot of signs, people must notice at least (not only as for Love).

I tried to learn to see them since 30 y.o. Some people think that is just good intuition and may be they are right, but it works still.

I think, that by means of signs, somebody, something or just your brains help you to chose the right way.

It cab be in sleeping in the majority of cases, but in real life as well.