PDA

View Full Version : Apple wine



Aprill
05-10-2004, 16:39
Women are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree.
Most men don't want to reach for the good ones
because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just take the rotten apples from the ground
that aren't as good, but easy.......

The apples at the top think something is wrong with them,
when in reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right man to come
along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the
way to the top of the tree.

Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine.
They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the ****
out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Sidney Bliss
05-10-2004, 16:45
.

85StonePolarBear
05-10-2004, 16:48
To Aprill - you are a friend, but :verymad: :verymad: :verymad: at that post ;)!

To Sid - one of the reasons I will never find love is that no woman alive has the computer skills needed to properly operate my microwave/convection/grill ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)!

sfjohns67
05-10-2004, 16:48
Heh heh, real cute Aprillechka, but here's MY version:

Women are also like those sour apples that have fallen to the ground from high up in the tree, who have sat there stewing and rotting and writhing in the dirt until they stink so bad and are so shriveled up that even the most disgusting and jaded man-grape can't stand to be next to them. Then along comes a good German liquor brewer, wearing of course a nice gas mask and carrying teflon tongs, who scoops these sour apple women up off the ground and turns them into a nifty little 110-proof aperitif called 'Apfelkorn.'

Then one good man-grape, tired of reaching for the tops of trees for a bunch of apples that think their shit don't stink and that they're too good for all and sundry, simply bypasses the entire apple orchard, goes to the nearest liquor store, picks up his bottle of Apfelkorn off the shelf and pays the clerk $22, then gathers all his buddies, those poor, jaded man-grapes, and together they all get so hammered they forget the pain of constantly having the shit stomped out of them by a bunch of snobby damned apples!

allice
05-10-2004, 16:50
Steve, if I wasn't in love, I would be. :D <takes her hat off>

Aprill
05-10-2004, 17:49
Sid, I believe there is no more place at YOUR kitchen.

Bear, do not take it personally, its not about men, its about humour :)

Steve, no comments...

85StonePolarBear
05-10-2004, 17:52
Originally posted by Aprill
Bear, do not take it personally, its not about men, its about humour :)

:) :) - I know that - but Sid's and Steve's humour were funnier and closer to the truth this time ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)!

Sidney Bliss
05-10-2004, 18:06
Originally posted by Aprill
Sid, I believe there is no more place at YOUR kitchen.


Oh you know me too well! At the last count I've apparently got 27 girlfriends you know:rolleyes:

Naked volleyball anyone?

Aprill
05-10-2004, 18:10
I do not know you as well, you know...only your blatant self-advertising brings me some info about your active private life :) 28 people will be enough to make several volleyball teams, won't they?

Aprill
05-10-2004, 18:15
Bear, and i like your humour about alive women more :)


[i] ...one of the reasons I will never find love is that no woman alive has the computer skills needed to properly operate my microwave/convection/grill ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)! [/B]

am4rw
05-10-2004, 18:16
Thank you! :) I sent this to my wife. Describes our relationship exactly!!!! :) :) :)

Sidney Bliss
05-10-2004, 18:17
Originally posted by Aprill
I do not know you as well, you know...only your blatant self-advertising brings me some info about your active private life :)

Well, I hope the inaccurate, salacious bits'n'pieces from the gossips kept you amused ;)

Aprill
05-10-2004, 18:24
no doubt :)

J.D.
05-10-2004, 18:38
Why do these apples at the top of the tree think they are the best?
Is it just because they are at the top?
Do you think they would be satisfied with my sour grapes if I went to the trouble to climb up there?
No, I'll take the apple that's wants some adventure and lets loose of whatever part the tree she's on.

Maine Surfer
05-10-2004, 18:44
I love women. Women are great.

i don't like men. All men suck.

But I love being man.

Aprill
05-10-2004, 19:43
If you manage to satisfy them with your sour grapes , J.D. , I will be very amused)

Aprill
05-10-2004, 19:45
mein lieber Surfer, you are justifying my first impression of you :)

J.D.
05-10-2004, 19:49
Keep hanging on to the top of that tree. The illusion, I mean the view is much better up there.

Aprill
05-10-2004, 20:17
Aprill on a tree, that's funny :)