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Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 13:11
Pub has been open a week and we haven't had a Bar Fight!! :confused:

OK, I'll start it then, 'hey you Ned get off my stool, you Rolf Harris Dingo breathed Colonist you'! :mad:

Fight fight wherever you may be, we are the Boys from the Black Country...... (singing in antagonising manner or maybe its in agony).

:agree:

Boscoe hasn't had time to fix a 'contract' with OMON yet so we're not going to get our skulls split open. :p

Ned Kelly
14-07-2004, 13:13
i'm only on it because you fell of it and have been passed out on the floor in a pool of urine for the last 4 hours...

Kshisya
14-07-2004, 13:24
:D:inlove: ~pulling the chair, placing it on the bar, climbing up, taking out binoculars~:nerd:

:hooray: tks ! common men!! be more active!:inlove: Ned! hit him with your best shot on a jaw! :hooray:

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 13:28
Don't know why you're so smarmy, you're still covered in Horace's puke!

OK back to the fight, how do you get 4 Aussies on a Bar Stool?

Answer: - Turn it up-side down!

That's the one, always attack their masculinity, always gets a swing going.

K Girl get back out in the kitchen and fill that bucket with cold water and bring a towel.

Kshisya
14-07-2004, 13:32
:nerd:Wolf!! am too busy watching!!!:rolleyes: if I leave I might miss it all!!! :p anybody's bleeding yet??? :D:inlove:

hey! somebody bring the sh*t Wolf asked for!!! :cussing:

:watching::watching:

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 13:38
He's trying a new tactic - hypnotism with those corks swinging from his hat. No flies on us though.

A bar tip for the females, how do you keep the flies off your ice cream in summer? Answer, take your underwear off.

Not sure I'll get away with that one.

Anyone fancy a game of Strip Dominoes whilst Ned is flexing his muscle. Hope he's not peeing all over the floor again.

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 13:43
Some good bar fight banter.

Customer: Oi Barman, get your ass in to gear, I've been standing here for hours waiting to get served.

Barman: I could refuse to serve you, you know.

Customer: I could stick your head through those Optics so get moving!

Been in some rough pubs, the Midlands ones are great when they have a Pub Quizz and the first question is, Oi, what are you looking at!

Ned Kelly
14-07-2004, 14:29
Originally posted by Moscow Wolf

OK back to the fight, how do you get 4 Aussies on a Bar Stool?

Answer: - Turn it up-side down!


good one!

the thing is, before you could say jack robinson there'd be four englishmen on there and they'd already be carping about the length or breadth of the particular leg they got....

whingeing bastards...

boscoe
14-07-2004, 15:42
Wolfie I have a baseball bat if you'd like to borrow it?

Let's see if he's as funny with broken teeth ;)

whingeing bastards indeed!

Ned Kelly
14-07-2004, 15:45
Originally posted by boscoe
Wolfie I have a baseball bat if you'd like to borrow it?

Let's see if he's as funny with broken teeth ;)

whingeing bastards indeed!

ned suspects it might have been the wrong line when he looks around and notes that 99% of the patrons fit the category he mentioned.

c'arn, i'll have yuz!

Ghost
14-07-2004, 15:48
Bar fights are 300p. on the menu. Pay freaking attention, tosser!

DJ Biscuit
14-07-2004, 15:51
You said tosser! And to think you claimed earlier not speak English! ;)

Ned Kelly
14-07-2004, 15:54
LOL!:p

Ghost
14-07-2004, 15:56
I don't speak Spanish either, but I know what "Puta" is!

Ned Kelly
14-07-2004, 15:57
ghost, hope you're on the ex-colonial side of this fight because i'm outnumbered as hell here.

DJ Biscuit
14-07-2004, 15:58
LOL!!

But you don't use it in every day speech.

Do you?

Kshisya
14-07-2004, 16:13
ah :rolleyes: nothing new! :rolleyes: no real fight:suspect: no blood:rolleyes: only these drunk mugs kissing each other with enthusiasm :rolleyes:

~jumping from the bar, taking somebody's broken tooth as a souvinir, getting back to the kitchen whistling~

boscoe
14-07-2004, 16:33
Hey you lot NO F*CKING SWEARING!!!

ladies present!

plastique
14-07-2004, 17:41
eh barkeep shuv it oop yer piehole...

Ghost
14-07-2004, 20:50
Ned - I gots yo back...

See, when the crowd gets wild, I yell something like "Hey you (insert insult in language I don't speak), have a look here!" and then I pull up Plastique's shirt.

Best crowd control anywhere. People look like they've been hypnotized.

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 21:07
I can feel it coming in the air tonight, Oh Lord........

lochnessmonster
14-07-2004, 21:32
Talking of pulling up Plastique's shirt, has anyone else seen the latest copy of 'night people'? FOUR entire pages of people's pierced belly buttons. Mmm mmm ! I'm sure I spotted yours in there somewhere, but with so many to choose from....

lucytupper
14-07-2004, 22:00
Originally posted by Moscow Wolf
Pub has been open a week and we haven't had a Bar Fight!! :confused:

OK, I'll start it then, 'hey you Ned get off my stool, you Rolf Harris Dingo breathed Colonist you'! :mad:

Fight fight wherever you may be, we are the Boys from the Black Country...... (singing in antagonising manner or maybe its in agony).

:agree:

Boscoe hasn't had time to fix a 'contract' with OMON yet so we're not going to get our skulls split open. :p


Hey Wolfman,

What part of the Black Country are you from?

If you say Wolverhampton. Then you know that is NOT in the Black Country.

If you REALLY are from the Black Country keep singing! If you are not, shut the f44k up and leave it to the REAL Black Country boys.

Or'roight aar kid?

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 22:32
Kingswinford, borders of Pensnett and Lower Gornal, Black enough for you TossPott! ;)

Smurfette
14-07-2004, 22:39
Kingswinford is pretty bloody posh compared to pensnett, I drive through every day, not sure if you can count that as true black country, don't hear many strong b/c accents from kingswinford!!

If you'd said brierley hill or cradley then I might agree and also congratulate you on escaping...

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 22:55
I escaped over 30 years ago, K'Ford wasn't so posh then, nearly all council houses. I worked as an apprentice in the Steel Industry, I know what the Black Country is all about. My Grandfathers worked in Round Oak Steel Works in Brierley Hill (now the Merry Hill Shopping Centre) and my other Grandfather worked for John Thompsons, heavy engineering.

My Father worked for Richard Thomas and Baldwins before it was Nationlised to become British Steel. I spent the first two years of my life in Quarry Bank.

My Father used to say, I can work in shit, but I don't have to live in it! ;)

Smurfette
14-07-2004, 23:03
Ok fair enough, I'll let you go with that! I have the dubious pleasure of working in Russell's Hall Hosp - some patients are very 'individual'. I can understand them now though.

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 23:15
Well RHH is really neither Pensnett or Dudley its well...... Russell's Hall. Never been in the place only drove past it, although my old 92 year old Gran died in there a few years back. She slipped on the highly polished floor whilst doing her morning 10 mile jog with a full rucksack of course! wink. Sad thing is, she was only in there to have her Nikes changed. (two winks)

Smurfette
14-07-2004, 23:18
Well have to say wouldn't recommend being treated there (but the pharmacy service is excellent!!), although the new wing is very lovely. No cute doctors though, really it's biggest failing.

Moscow Wolf
14-07-2004, 23:27
Yeah I agree, who needs cute Doctors when you have cute Nurses! Could be worse though, you could be working in the Corbett or Wordsley Hospital (if they're still open).

Smurfette
14-07-2004, 23:36
I need cute doctors!! Have work at both the other 2, they are still open for a few more months!

lucytupper
14-07-2004, 23:47
Wolfie - keep singing!

You ARE Black Country! Close enough for me anyway. What irritates me the most is those Brummies claiming to come from the Black Country. They are NOWHERE near!!

Round Oak brings back memories for me. I remember playing cricket on their pitch many a time for Accles and Pollock. It is a shame it is not there now!

If the ode 'uns could come back and see the Black country now, they would'nt recognise it!

I hail from Whiteheath. In between Oldbury and Blackheath!

I lived in Stoke for a while. I found the stokies to be very similar to the Black country folk. Very friendly and down to earth.

Well Wolfie, must go. Ta - ra and keep out the 'oss road!

plastique
15-07-2004, 11:27
i need to log on more..when the time comes to defend myself we already are a page ahead....